Thursday, August 29, 2013

A Special Gift from a Son

Monica and I purchased the movie "Home Run" this past weekend. It's about a baseball player. We bought it to watch with our son Kenny, who is 15 and a pretty gifted baseball player.I love the game of baseball too and began playing from a very early age as Kenny did. If you haven't already seen the movie, here is a little description from their web site. If you have seen it, you can skip the next paragraph.

"Baseball all-star Cory Brand knows what it takes to win in the big leagues. But off the field, with memories of his past haunting him, his life is spiraling out of control.Hoping to save her client's career and reputation after a DUI and a team suspension, Cory's agent sends him back to the small town where he grew up. Forced to coach the local youth baseball team and spend eight weeks in the only recovery program in town, Cory can't wait to return to his old life as quickly as possible.As his young players help him experience the joy of the game, Cory discovers his need to find freedom from his past and hope for his future … and win back the love he left behind. With this unexpected second chance, Cory finds himself on a powerful journey of transformation and redemption. Based on thousands of true stories, HOME RUN is a powerful reminder that with God, it's never too late … freedom is possible."

The movie hit especially close to home for me personally, because the star, Cory Brand, grew up with an alcoholic father, just like I did. I also grew up in a small town just as Cory did. My dad coached me in Little League. He was a big baseball fan and taught me a great deal about the game, but he was also an alcoholic for most of my childhood into my mid-twenties. At the end of the movie, Cory shares his testimony. When I heard him begin his testimony, I had to get up out of my chair and walk into the kitchen. An emotional nerve inside was uncovered. The movie ended shortly thereafter.

Fast forward to a couple of days later. Monica, Kenny and I were traveling in the car to take him back to his dad's house in Shawnee. Kenny lives with his dad and one of the reasons is because he loves baseball, he love's his dad and his dad get's to coach him at the Varsity level in the high school he attends. Somehow we got to talking about the movie and Monica asked me if it was hard for me to watch. I told her that is was uncomfortable, but wasn't too bad until Cory gave his testimony and that is when I needed to get up and go to the kitchen.(A faith walk had just begun)

I proceeded to talk about my childhood, living with an alcoholic father and my parents eventual divorce. I talked about how my young adulthood was not a great time for me because of some of the mistakes I made and some of those, I realize, came from the result of a dad with alcoholism. One of the  tragic results of my mistakes was a divorce of my own and a selfish lifestyle similar to Cory's selfish lifestyle in the movie. But I also talked about how God had saved me. Thankfully, I too have experienced the amazing transformation and redemption God has worked through my life, just as Cory did in the movie.

Kenny was sitting in the front seat of the car, listening the whole time and not saying much. He must have heard the pain in my story. Then he said these encouraging words, "Terry, thanks for being such a great dad." He didn't say anything else, but he didn't have to. I'm his step dad. He was 5 years old when Monica and I were married. Step dad or biological father, there is no greater gift, that he could have ever given me, than to say those words. I'm not perfect.I have never thought of myself as a great dad/step dad. In fact, I have often wondered, as a step dad, if I am making a difference in my step sons lives, but those unsolicited words from Kenny, affirmed that I may have done some things right.

Kenny has a huge heart. He has always been that way. It's something both Monica and I talk about often; how blessed we are by his soft heart. I know that he loves the Lord. It shows in his Spirit. He is a very caring young man. And he cared enough to share that gift with me, when he could have chosen to stay silent. It was something that I will treasure for the rest of my life.How powerful words can be!

Dad's have an undeniable responsibility to make an eternal difference, one way or the other, in your children's lives. Don't give up. There is no easy road. It takes time, courage, commitment and sometimes you make mistakes. But your children should never question your love for them and your desire to protect and lead them in a Godly way to a point where they will be stand on a firm foundation of their faith in Jesus Christ. And maybe one day they will say those words that I was so blessed to hear from Kenny, "thanks for being such a great dad."

Deuteronomy 6 “This is the command—the statutes and ordinances—the Lord your God has instructed me to teach you, so that you may follow them in the land you are about to enter and possess. Do this so that you may fear the Lord your God all the days of your life by keeping all His statutes and commands I am giving you, your son, and your grandson, and so that you may have a long life. Listen, Israel, and be careful to follow them, so that you may prosper and multiply greatly, because Yahweh, the God of your fathers, has promised you a land flowing with milk and honey.“Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is One. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart.Repeat them to your children.Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

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