For over three years the Berg's have set aside one night a week just to be together. In the past year we started being more intentional with a devotional and counting down our days together (what's been dubbed "Berg Family Fun Night" by our kids). When I look over my calendar and through the pics on my phone, of the countless activities we've took part in, I'm filled with joy. However, I also remember a few hard nights, like this week. Though I'll spare you the dialogue know that the context was anger. In fact, as I type this my head is filled with emotions from frustration that we don't have it together to fear that my kids will remember those nights over the good ones. This monday we were coming home from a birthday party of one of Jackson's classmates. Upon arrival to the garage I asked for teeth to be brushed, jammies on and reconvened in the living room. After twenty minutes we still didn't have it together and really I should have known it was going to be downhill from the party. Through the tears, raised voices and being sent to their rooms without a bedtime snack, it hit me... I definitely overacted and didn't show them Jesus, BUT WHY WAS I SO MAD?! In the article '10 Surefire Ways to Make Your Kids Hate Family Devotionals' the author Jessica Thompson says: "Family
devotions are a good thing. They can be a means of grace to your entire family,
but often we turn them into an idol. We get some idea in our head about how
devotions are supposed to look, and we won’t budge an inch from getting that
picture exactly right. Have you ever
been so rigid in your family devotional time that you made it drudgery instead
of a joy?" Did she hit it on the head? As I thought about our evening I thought of several reasons it went south but the biggest one was probably the tight hold I have had on my expectations for our Monday nights. I want so badly for each Monday to be the best night yet, for me and the family. The reality, however, is that some days are stressful at work and don't allow enough time for me (or the family) to detox before jumping right into another "activity." Often, things come up and though we want our one day a week to be sacred (not intentionally scheduling things there) sometimes things come up. But most of all, our hearts need to be ready and in a position to overflow with love to others if we want to be the hands and feet of Christ. In short, I had in fact made an idol out of our family nights! What!? No... Family time cannot be an idol!! Our pastor at New Beginnings (Dr. Phil) started a sermon series this week, impeccable timing I know, called "Mine" (read more about it here). One of the most thought provoking statements I heard this week was: "even good things [God created things] can become idols in our lives when it's more important than God." If you were here, move on but if you weren't, let that sink in... Good things (nature, food, sports, money, the Bible, kids... family) can be bad when we allow them to take over and rule our lives. When our ultimate happiness is found in ANYTHING over Christ's love and will in our lives, we will not only be let down at some point but be led astray on our purpose in life. I know what you're thinking: "But Jeff, God wants you to spend time with your family and teach them about Him." Absolutely True!! However, when our evenings end in yelling and anger I should probably stop and assess the evening. I was more concerned with checking the box ("Family Devotional") than I was with the hearts of my family. As I look back over the list from the article by Thompson, though some are just funny ("Make sure that Carman’s “The Champion” is always playing in the background") some hit me really hard:
"Don’t allow
your kids to act like kids. Make sure they sit completely still and listen to
every word you say"
"Expect
immediate, visible results. If they are not...asking for forgiveness by the end of the devotional
time, you have done something wrong"
"Don’t let
them see your weakness. Make sure that if there is a question about confessing
sin, you point out all of their sin. Don’t ever bring up the ways you
fail"
Reading that last one especially speaks heavily that I had not prepared myself (in prayer, devotions, etc.) to overflow His love and grace, which ultimately translates to: "I not only can do this on my own but I can do it better than God." Idols are scary... They come from everywhere and can even be blessings from God, Himself, that we twisted just a little. Though I can't take back Monday, I can prepare for future Mondays, as well as, my day-to-day life putting God absolutely first. *Please join us for our new series: MINE
May You give us protection from ourselves... May His Spirit led us to conviction in our own hearts... May His Son show us the grace necessary to live as His hands and feet... May we worship You Father as the only true God... May I serve You well in my family and life!!
The Berg's
**Follow Jeff (Family Pastor of High School), also known as "surgeberg" on: Facebook, Twitter& Instagram
Last Tuesday in my blog I wrote about the celebration of baptism for Sankie, our oldest son. Thursday of that week we found out our baby (four months in pregnancy) had died.
We cannot see nor understand what caused the death of this little baby. But it is not unknown by God. This situation is "totally meaningful," as Piper declares. At the moment, grasping and desiring hope, because hearts are hopeless. That is meaningful. Treasuring and enjoying little lives around us and the birth of new babies to friends. That is meaningful. Experiencing pain and loss and crying out for a better world void of those things. That is meaningful. Celebrating new spiritual life in a son and looking at the resurrection of Christ as all-sufficient for his future in the midst of losing another child. It is all meaningful.
In the same week we were sobered by the reality of Jesus’ death on the cross and then celebrated His resurrection, along with our son’s baptism, we were humbled by the reality of suffering and loss just a few days later.
Where is God in the middle of pain and suffering? Where is God’s presence in grief?
The week prior to that our church had held a funeral service for the death of another young man from our church body.
At the same time, we saw the birth of new babies and the joy of new life in several families around us. So as we celebrate the joyful occasion of new life we are also halted by the reality that life is a vapor and not only passes quickly, but can be snuffed out at any time and at any stage.
So again, where is God in the middle of personal tragedy and loss? Many people have murmuring thoughts, though those thoughts may not become formalized into a statement from their lips. The thoughts swarming in our hearts and heads can be “Why do we see so much evil if God is so good?”
There are actually many questions that we hear:
—Does God cause these things to happen to us to get our attention or as punishment?
—Did we do something wrong and God is now correcting us through these circumstances?
—Was God so busy with major world events that this personal tragedy slipped by Him?
—Even if God did not cause it, did He allow this to happen or was this just one of those freak incidents?
—If God didn’t cause it, but He did allow it, knowing that it would cause us great pain, then how loving is that God who has the power to change circumstances—but doesn’t?
God has not remained silent on these matters. In the dark hours after personal tragedy, as warm tears roll down your cheeks and as you feel that tightening ball of muscles in your stomach—there is a temptation to let the silence speak for God. “Why!!!?…Why her!!!?…Why us!!!?…Why at this point in life!!!?” Yet there is silence.
Some people desire to hear an internal “voice” from God. Some people wish for a dream to comfort them about the recent tragedy. Others want God to give answer to their hurting souls in the middle of those moments. Yet silence. That silence, however, does not mean that God has not spoken. God has spoken in His word, the Bible, that directs our hearts back to truth.
Our difficulty is that we allow feelings and emotions to override the truth God has spoken to us in His word—and specifically in His Son. God created our emotions and feelings. Emotions and feelings are good, but they need to be appropriately responding to truth from God, about God, and about us, fallen man.
Sure, there are swirling thoughts with heated, heart-pounding emotions in many moments for many weeks and months after personal tragedy. But God’s word solidifies and grounds our thoughts in truths about who God is—His character—His attributes. Truths that bring faith-building, emotion-filling, heart-rending strength in the middle of crushing weakness.
So how does God break the silence in our mourning and grief? Where is God’s presence in grief?
—Does God cause these things to happen to us to get our attention or as punishment?
—Did we do something wrong and God is now correcting us through these circumstances?
The Bible is clear that God is not the author of sin nor the cause of sin. There are three main influencers that direct towards sin: 1) Satan and his minions; 2) the fallen world around us that has been corrupted by sin; 3) our hearts. Those are the influencers towards sin—Satan/demons, a fallen, corrupted world, and sinful hearts. But God is not the author of sin.
See James 1:13-18
God is the “Giver” of all good things. Good things including babies. All small babies, at day one of conception are valuable because they are both human and they are made in the image of God. It is a great mystery how all beings can be, at the same time, sinfully depraved and deserving wrath, yet intrinsically valuable as would-be image-bearers of God and so valuable that God sent His Son seeing them as redeemable.
When large scale tragedies or disasters occur (tsunamis, hurricanes, tornadoes) some people attribute it directly to God’s judgment because the people affected are thought to be “deserving” of God’s wrath. But God’s word does not tell us that New Orleans or Bangledesh deserves God’s wrath more than other cities. In that thinking, what about Joplin? What about Moore? So when a Christian leader attributes a tragedy as God’s punishment—we need to be careful in who we’re listening to.
On a more personal level, when tragedy hits a home, it is both common and almost “normal” for many questions to arise wondering if it was something God actively did for a wrong we’ve done. The difficulty with this stance is that God is neither currently writing nor audibly speaking to each person on this. Everything from traffic jams, flat tires, stomach flues, chicken pox, being out of milk, and losing a baby could fall into the category of God punishing me because of a personal sin. So discerning any kind of “internal voice” or “feeling” or “God told me” is such a dangerously subjective path that it’s difficult to come to solid conclusions. So, again, we need the truth that we know God has given us in HIs word to bring us clarity.
God does discipline HIs children, so we need wisdom from God to interpret and understand difficult issues (James 1:2-5). But most importantly, God punished His own Son for the sins we have previously and currently committed. Jesus took that punishment for sin.
—Was God so busy with major world events that this personal tragedy slipped by Him?
This type of thinking usually points to a person’s view of God. Is God all-sufficiently sovereign? I’ve sat in funerals and other situations where good-intentioned comforting friends tell grieving families that “If God could have just made it there a few seconds earlier this accident would have been avoided,” or “God would never have allowed this to happen. Maybe your faith was just weak?” The intention is to comfort. The thinking is horrific. Is God so insufficient that He is merely hurrying through the earth from accident to accident, making it to some barely in time, yet making it to some just a little too late? Does God not know the events of the future down to every last increment?
If God is not the God who knows the exact place of every colliding molecule in all the universe—then He is not God at all. In seeking comfort and peace, it does not help me to think of a spiritual ambulance-driving God who makes it to some scenes late because He didn’t know about it til too late.
I want a God who is a rock and a refuge. I don’t want a small, weak, unknowing, tardy God. I want the God of the Bible who knows the end from the beginning (Is. 46:5-11) and knits together every atom of the universe (Job 38; Psalm 139) and whose same Son who holds those atoms together (Col. 1:15-17) is the same One who came to give Himself as a ransom (1 Tim. 2:5-6) for the whole fallen mess.
An omniscient, omnipotent, omni-benevolent high and exalted Godhead is the One me and my wife and kids must lift our eyes to in those moments of halted silence. This God, who watched and saw the events unfolding in our lives is not cold nor unattached. This God, is the One who is present with us and will walk us through it, though pain may never cease while on this earth, but this God knows the loss of a perfect, innocent Son who traded places with individuals who didn’t deserve His life. This same God holds the power of new life and resurrection.
—Even if God did not cause it, did He allow this to happen or was this just one of those freak incidents?
—If God didn’t cause it, but He did allow it, knowing that it would cause us great pain, then how loving is that God who has the power to change circumstances—but doesn’t?
This mystery is commonly referred to as “The Problem of Evil.” It is meant to discredit the idea of a God who is all-knowing, all-powerful, and all-loving. It states that if God does know all events occurring (birds dying, cancer, deer laying wounded on roadsides, babies suffering, abuse to children) and is at the same time all-powerful—then wouldn’t that God do something to act and stop those events from causing ongoing pain and suffering? And if that God does know about these events and has the power to stop it but doesn’t—then would that God really be considered loving? The conclusion is that if God is defined as all-knowing, all-powerful, and all-loving—then there would not be evil in this world (because He would stop it). But since we do know there is evil in this world—then this God must not exist.
There are many books and writings expounding on both sides of the problem of evil. Apologetics courses and theology courses walk you through answering some of these tough questions. Those can be very rich discussions. I simply would ask, “Why is there not more evil?”
I would suggest that it is only because of God’s general grace, His everlasting love, His enduring patience, His extending mercy, and His compassion for HIs people is what keeps us from experiencing more evil.
The Real Problem of Evil?
So, why not more evil? Why are there not more epidemics, more natural disasters, more atrocities, more deaths, more suffering? Why is so much evil held back when we all deserve so much less grace and less mercy?
I come back to the same question I had last week at Sankie’s baptism…”Why so much undeserved grace?”
Where is God's presence in grief?
It was most brilliantly and shamefully and disgracefully and gloriously displayed on the cross of Jesus Christ. God is present with us, right now, in grief, because Jesus took on the type of grief that causes holy innocence to cry out, "Father, if this cup could pass (the cup of God's wrath) let it pass, but let Your will be done."
Our only true hope in grief is to look to the same Jesus and His cross to see and understand and know that God is with us in this light and momentary affliction.
If
you’ve ever sat within earshot of me on a Sunday morning, A) I'm sorry and B) you may have trouble
believing this, but I actually love music and truly enjoy singing. Because I do
care for others, I typically remand my vocal talents (or lack thereof) to the
shower or afternoon drive home from work. And though I’m sure the “make a
joyful noise” verses in Scripture are directed at folks like me, I must say, I
am often moved by music and song. Sometimes it’s an instrumental piece that
extracts emotion from my soul for which words can’t describe. On other
occasions it is thoughtfully penned lyrics that resonate within my heart. In
either case, to fully engage in music at a deeper level, is truly refreshing and worshipful.
However, as much as I love music, I must confess that I love the Gospel even
more. For this reason, although I enjoy many varieties of music, I tend to
gravitate toward places and musicians that combine the two. And when these
two components do come together, it is special and indeed something to be shared.
On
Sunday evening Jimmy Needham will be performing here at the church. He is an
exceptionally gifted artist that has collaborated with the likes of Trip Lee,
Lecrae, as well as the SHANES and many others. Being a church body that believes
in family ministry, we love the fact that Jimmy is a family guy that adores his
wife (“Unfailing Love,” “Firefly”) and their two daughters (“Daddy’s Baby Girl,”
“If I Ever Needed Grace”). But above being a solid dude that is super-talented
vocally, Jimmy’s strongest attribute is that he is consistently promoting
something much bigger than himself. He is a Gospel guy that by God’s grace is
utilizing his gifts and opportunities to point others to the hope that is found
in Christ alone. Let me illustrate this good news intentionality by briefly sharing
a few of my favorite lines from a handful of his songs…
“Grace Amazing” (enjoy the above video) speaks of our depravity and helplessness without God. “No one can come to the Son, unless the
Father compels him to come. Our hearts are bottomless, if we’re autonomous…”
In a song from a few albums back “Forgiven and Loved,” Jimmy reminds us of
Romans 8:1. The lyrics express one working to earn a salvation that has already
been freely given. Accepting Jesus for justification without also trusting in
Christ for sanctification – not hearing the precious words, “Child, you are forgiven and loved!”
This is a struggle I can relate with and a truth I need reminded of daily.
Praise God there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ! While the title track from Clear the Stageaddresses the topics of worship and the subtleties of idolatry, “The Only One” transparently uncovers the emptiness of false idols as well. Listen to the
very real tension described… “Well the
news has spread, men ain’t meant for bread, but for every word, coming from
Your head. But my head and heart are very different things. One tells me to
run, and one tells me to cling.” I don’t know about you, but I can really connect with that last line... Consider the song “Arrows” (from the God is NOT Dead soundtrack) in which
Jimmy talks about seeing Christ revealed through everything from Creation to
children, to the very air we breathe. All of these things point to God and are,
“pictures that echo (God’s) glory.” With
this in mind, we should all long for the same prayer: “Make me Your arrow. Put me in Your bow.
Pull back and let go, and send me wherever you want me to go.”
In
closing, I’d also encourage you to check out some of his spoken word poetry in
“Not Without Love (The Benediction)” and “Nightlights”. Each describes a very
desperate need and reliance upon God’s grace and goodness. In his most recent
album, Hymn Sessions – Vol. 1, Jimmy
highlights the rich Gospel content of some classic hymns. As he recently shared with Desiring God, we should love hymns because “theology breeds doxology.” Jimmy Needham has described his
motivation simply as this: “to whet
people’s appetite for the God of the gospel.” He goes on to say, “I think the answer to all of our deepest
questions can be found at the foot of the cross of Jesus.”[1]
I wholeheartedly agree! Christ is the answer to our every longing - He is our
hope! I pray this truth will always be our song…
Well,
it is easy to see why I’m so excited for the opportunity we have to partner
with Jimmy Needham for the sake of the Gospel. If you will be in the Tulsa area
Sunday, we’d love for you to join us. The concert is set to begin at 6:30;
doors open at 6. Tickets are available through the church office or online at
the link below for only $5.
I have been asked to write a Graduation Challenge for Graduation Sunday May 18th. The Graduation Milestone is becoming like the opposite bookend to the Parent/Child Dedication Milestone that we observe when the church and parents dedicate themselves to raising their children to become fully devoted followers of Jesus.
This is what I have thus far:
For the Church:
New Beginnings Church through your prayers, through your giving, and through exercising your faith and gifts you have made an eternal investment in the lives of these graduates standing before you today. Because of your faithfulness, you have been privileged by our God to commit these lives to God’s purpose and God’s glory. Please stand to give this charge and challenge.
Under the guidance and empowering of the Holy Spirit do you believe these graduates are prepared to become responsible adults and effective disciples of Jesus as they begin their journey into adulthood? (We do!)
Under the guidance and empowering of the Holy Spirit do you believe these graduates are equipped to lead their peers and future families to love God and follow His ways? (We do!)
Under the guidance and empowering of the Holy Spirit do you believe these graduates are ready to advance the Gospel and accomplish the mission of God to reach the world for Jesus Christ? (We do!)
Read aloud this charge from Colossians 3, to our graduates: “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. 3 For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.”
For the Parents
New mother, Julie Sallee Partin, graduating from Biola U.
Parents you love these graduates more than your own life. Although you were not perfect parents, you sacrificed time and money, comfort and ease, peace and quiet, and selfish pursuits to give these graduates every opportunity to become the young adults they are today. But today you are going to be asked to make you greatest sacrifice thus far.
Parents are you ready to entrust your faith to your graduate and trust that they will take hold, cultivate, and own the faith for them selves?
Parents are you ready to trust God with your graduate’s future and allow your graduate to navigate that future as responsible young adults?
For the Graduates
Do you accept these challenges and declare that you are prepared to embrace, cultivate, and take ownership of your faith, future, as disciples and missionaries of Jesus Christ?
Let worship the Lord God for this glorious moment!
What do you think about this challenge and graduate commission? I realize that these are lofty challenges, however, if we lower our expectations we can expect our kids to achieve them every time.
Do you remember when your child first began to speak real words? It was such a joy to hear the words daddy or mommy. Gradually they learn more and more words. They are becoming your pride and joy. They are learning so well and so fast. A year or two later all of the sudden out of the back seat of the car on your way to the store, there comes a word you have never heard come from your child before and hope never comes out again. A word that shouldn't be spoken by anyone, let alone a two, three or four year old. Where could they have possibly learned that word you say? You are mortified. You begin to think, "where in the world would this little child hear such a word?" and then you realize it was YOU who said that word while you were in the car with you child one day. You remember that you had to slam on the brakes and almost crashed into the car in front of you. It just came out without hesitation, in anger, fear, frustration, but little Johnny was sitting in his car seat in the back and now he has learned a new word. Ooops!!!
Parents make mistakes and children are watching and listening. Children continue to watch and listen as they grow into teenagers and then into adults.
So if we can't be perfect, what's the next best thing for our children to see and to learn from us? Character. In his book, "The Conviction to Lead: 25 Principles For Leadership That Matters", Albert Mohler writes a chapter on "Leadership is All About Character". In this chapter, he writes:
"This is the leader's responsibility.....to deal with himself. We are not perfect, and claims of perfection will only serve to undermine our leadership. We will fail, and we must be answerable for those failures. Our sin will show up in our leadership, usually without delay. Character is indispensable to credibility, and credibility is essential to leadership. The great warning to every leader is that certain sins and scandals can spell the end of our leadership. We can forfeit our role as leader and the stewardship of leadership can be taken from us. When our lives are shown to be at odds with our convictions, we destroy everything we have sought to build. At the very least, inconsistency in our lives gives license for others to nurture their own consistencies. At its worst, moral and convictional failure spell disaster from which the leader has no way to recover. Leaders like all sinners, can be forgiven. But forgiveness does not restore credibility, and character must be seen as something that can be lost far easier than gained, much less restored. Leaders of character produce organizations of character because character, like conviction, is infectious. Followers are drawn to those whose character attracts them as something they want for themselves. Fairly regularly, we see debates over the meaning of character and leadership in public life. Most of it is nonsense. We know that character matters when we hire a baby-sitter. How can it not matter when we are calling a leader?"
So, parents, are your lives "shown to be at odds with our convictions"? If so, according to Mohler, "we destroy everything we have sought to build. At the very least, inconsistency in our lives gives license for others to nurture their own consistencies. At its worst, moral and convictional failure spell disaster from which the leader has no way to recover.
Pray for this in your parenting, "Character is indispensable to credibility, and credibility is essential to leadership." Pray for your character and your credibility with your children. Pray for that character be protected from Satan's attack. So that your character can lead to children who want to follow you as their leader, "Leaders of character produce organizations of character because character, like conviction, is infectious. Followers are drawn to those whose character attracts them as something they want for themselves."
Do your children know what convicts you? Do they know why you believe what you do? And more importantly, do you live what you believe about those convictions, in front of them enough to make it "infectious" for them? Do they want character for themselves?
Last week (if you are an avid NBFamilies Blog reader) we saw each of the family pastors share their Faith Talks surrounding the Passover Seder. And this week you may have also noticed a trend: Baptizing our kids!! Though, Jax & Rae (our oldest two) also recently finished the "I'm a Christian Now" class with Sank and the Chan-Man, they want to be baptized in Haiti. Please, stay tuned in June for that really cool post. That being said... What if things are not going so well for you raising your kids right now? Well, if that's you (like me), apparently you are not alone!! A recent study was completed stating that "kids aggravate their parents more than they did 15 years ago." The study wraps up with more questions than answers... Here are just a few that I have:
Are current financial stresses causing some of the tension?
Are there new themes in our culture that makes it more difficult?
Are our kids actually worse than we were?
Are todays parents just less equipped than those in previous generations?
Nope... No answers, just that we (current parents) are more stressed by our kids today than before. So what does that mean for us? NBFamilies just finished up our 'Spring Family Equipping' and we debriefing about our times we all made an observation that "parents just don't seem to have much time!" Finding a D-Group for families, committing to the two week class, having a regular sit-down dinner, planning a faith talk, etc. all seemed hard because of time. As a parent of three, personally working a full-time job, a spouse who also has a job, school musicals, sports, church activities, "friends" birthday parties and on and on. I get it...Life is nuts!!! But the amount of time we have didn't change from 15 years ago. I love the quote: "Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson and Albert Einstein." I'm not trying to get on to anyone here. I'm just stating life is crazy and we can never plan ahead of all the crazy that will probably happen. But I wanted to make a plea for this post to be different... Can we make this one more interactive? Please answer one or more of the following questions in the comments:
Why do you think our kids are more aggravating today?
What is the hardest thing in your schedule every week?
How can NBFamilies do a better job of Equipping or Supporting you?
The Bergs
**Follow Jeff (Family Pastor of High School), also known as "surgeberg" on: Facebook, Twitter& Instagram
This past Sunday was one of the most incredible experiences of my life as a father. Getting to baptize our oldest son Sankie will remain as one of the most special events in my life. I hope to be able to do the same with Owen, Jackson and whoever this next one is!
Me baptizing Sankie II Easter Sunday
Jamie and I have prayed and prayed and taught and corrected and disciplined and trained and yet—none of that earns salvation for a child. So this is not a story of how great we’ve been as parents which equated to a kid getting to heaven. Instead, I hope you hear the screaming question of why so much grace?
If we’re not careful, we begin to think that all our good efforts in parenting should bump us up on the list toward our children being saved. Now of course, we never verbalize that or allow ourselves to admit it. But it may be there nonetheless. Across the spectrum of evangelicalism (and cousin Charismatia) this expectation of “teaching them diligently” (Deut. 6:7) being completed in some equation to salvation may be seen in our frustrations or our impatience with our children. It may be detected in our desire to pridefully exhibit the perfect family image with quiet, still, smiling, clean, nicely-dressed little pictures of Godliness. God burst that bubble for us with child #1 in week #1—and continues to solidify with further examples! It may show up secretly as we jealously desire people to honor us and praise us as spiritual families. It may be seen with our contempt as we secretly point our finger in God’s face reminding Him of all we’ve “done” for Him with our children and service in the church.
Again, none of that impresses Him on a resume for salvation. All our attempts at good parenting are also “as filthy rags” (Is. 64:6) when it comes to earning merit or God owing us something in regards to salvation.
So, standing there looking down at the baptism tank as the boys were preparing for their time I had a screaming thought blaring in my head…”WHY?”
Testing the waters
Why so much goodness and grace poured out on a little guy who deserves nothing but wrath?
Why so much mercy for seven years of rebellion against God’s commands?
Why would God receive my son unto salvation when literally billions of people across the planet have not heard the name of Jesus nor the salvation He offers?
Why so much love and grace poured out on such unsuspecting souls?
Baptism screams at us the reality of God’s amazing grace. Ezekiel 37 tells the ridiculous story of dry bones miraculously being brought back to life as God is showing off His infinite power and supremacy above all things. I call it ridiculous because it is ridiculous for man to believe in spiritual rebirth (“born-again”) if not for a God who commands it and it happens according to His word. God is the only one who can bring dead souls to eternal life. God is the only one who has the power to make all things re-created in His Son’s likeness. Baptism should halt us and help us to think through and appreciate the grace of God in the great news of the gospel story.
Sankie, Chandler, and Noah
All the teachings, prayers, lessons, Faith Talks, Faith Walks, God-moments, and Bible readings do not save. They bring the good news of the gospel into the environment of the child. God, the Holy Spirit, breathes new life as the words of the gospel are articulated in the child’s hearing and sight. God is the only one who saves.
Baptism is a beautiful picture meant to show that a person who was once “dead in trespasses and sins,” (Eph. 2:1) has been brought into eternal life through what Christ accomplished on the cross.
A person formerly facing God’s wrath as rebels to His will now reconciled and adopted as a child of God. Where formerly they were lost in darkness pursuing their own way—now brought into the light. Where formerly they were guilty—now because Jesus took on their guilt—they are now pronounced “NOT GUILTY!” Solely because of what Christ did on the cross.
Once the Holy Spirit gives understanding to these truths and brings repentance and faith, the person is re-created internally with a new heart that desires to follow God’s law. This is the internal heart change wrought by the Holy Spirit of God.
Baptism is an outward expression proclaiming the great news that this person has been forgiven of sins (1 Pet. 3:18; Col. 1:13-14), justified by Christ (1 Cor. 6:11; Rom.8:30; Rom.5:9; Rom.5:1), adopted as children of God (1 John 2:28–3:3), and reconciled completely to God (2 Cor. 5:17-20).
Baptism does not save at all. There is nothing salvific about baptism. The water of baptism does not wipe away or wash away sins. Sins are completely and entirely forgiven by Jesus’ death on the cross. Baptism is not the “second requirement” of salvation. Salvation is by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone through His cross. There will be many people in heaven who were not baptized in water. There will also be many people in hell who had been baptized in some manner while on the earth. But baptism does not save.
Baptism is one of two ordinances given to the church (the other being the Lord’s Supper) to be performed repeatedly by local assemblies of believers to proclaim the death and resurrection of Jesus to the world around us until He returns. Individuals who put their trust in Christ’s atoning work on the cross are commanded to be baptized afterwards.
So what about baptizing children?
There has been much discussion with varied stances concerning how appropriate it is to baptize young children—especially children under the age of ten. Now for many of you, that may be “new” news to you. Some people are outraged when I even bring up the fact that people have questioned baptizing five and six year-olds. Over the last sixty years, the number of baptisms do not equate with the number of people who continue to participate in church. The growing concern has been that many people make “false professions” of faith either as a child at a young age or as a teen-ager. Over time, pastors and theologians have asked if baptism gives people a false sense of security or a false belief that they are going to heaven once they are baptized. That problem is not solved by taking away the water of baptism, which is in accordance with God’s word. That problem is a much larger discipleship problem throughout the church.
Some churches have decided they would set a certain age as the first eligible age for baptism (for example 12 years). The thought is that younger children (5-10 yr-olds) will have more time to sort of “give evidence” to their salvation. Everyone knows that it’s very difficult to see how much “lifechange” truly occurs in a five or six year-olds life. They don’t turn from drug abuse, sexual immorality, and debauchery at those ages. Some churches have even set the number as high as sixteen. Many of those churches who set numbers have gone back and removed the limitation because, Biblically speaking, you will become more pressed to show how forcibly delaying and restricting baptism to certain ages is more in line with orthodoxy. The Bible seems to point to more immediacy. Parents also become very frustrated when a child makes a profession of faith at six or seven and the church then tells them they have to explain to their child that they have to wait six more years for baptism. Again, you may find yourself justifying how you are a stumbling block to a child’s desire for obedience in baptism!
Matt baptizing Chandler Easter Sunday
I personally appreciate looking at baptism as an outward step of obedience in accordance with Scriptural commands (Acts 2:38; Matt. 28:18-20). I believe we can look at a younger professing believer’s intent and desire for obedience through baptism to be considered much like a “letter of intent.” For all their present understanding and ability, they believe God has saved them from their sins and to the best of their ability they desire to live for Jesus in obedience to His Lordship. Baptism is their first public proclamation that they love Jesus and understand He saved them in His death and resurrection. As stated many times, “from dead in trespasses and sins, raised to walk in newness of life,” (Eph. 2:1; 2 Cor. 5:17). Baptism is the visible outward picture of what has happened internally in the heart.
So, yes it is hard to discern. But if we believe that that first initial “response” or some sinner’s prayer at the front pew of a church is all we’re banking on, then we are the ones needing more help. Is there follow through and continuous discipleship going on before, during, and after a profession of faith is made? Are we teaching them what following Christ looks like and how it is lived out—or are we finished once they pray the prayer? Again, this is a much deeper problem of discipleship within the church at large.
I do believe churches have done much harm in having people walk an aisle—asking people to get baptized when they’ve never yet asked them if they understand the gospel and salvation.
I’m extremely encouraged to see many churches implementing a process or a class for younger children to go through to communicate, to the best of their ability at that age, what they believe has happened to them in salvation, what they believe the gospel message is, and what baptism is and is not. At least someone is asking them 1) if they’ve been saved and 2) what they believe that means. Bethlehem Baptist Church (Children Desiring God) has a helpful tool titled, Preparing Young People for Baptism.
Steve baptizing Noah Easter Sunday
Our church, New Beginnings, uses Lifeway’s resource, I’m A Christian Now!We have a couple, the Bowman’s, who teach through six weeks of the class repeatedly clarifying the message of the gospel, what it means to agree with God about our sin and need for Him, what it means to believe in the true offer of salvation in Christ, and what it means to confess our faith in Christ. This little book has some simple truths about baptism itself as well as Communion and other important truths about the church. There is also a second book that follows up after their baptism to help them learn how to follow Christ.
We have added a time at the completion of this class where I meet with the parents and the child desiring baptism. The six weeks leading up to this are extremely beneficial for being able to articulate their beliefs as well as clearing up any confusion they have on any number of things. I am able to hear from the parents their own assessment of the child’s profession as well as whether they’ve seen marked “Godly sorrow” as described in 2 Cor. 7 that results in a repentant heart. Again, we cannot judge hearts on salvation. We miss it even when we start inspecting fruit. But this is a good step that doesn’t postpone those desiring obedient baptism for five to seven years while at the same time providing a time of clarifying gospel-fluency and understanding of personal salvation.
