AN INCOMPARABLE WEIGHTY AND STRATEGIC TIME

JOHN 17

I just finished speaking at a Perspectives Class a couple of weeks ago. Perspectives is a class focusing on God’s global mandate throughout the Bible to take the gospel of Christ to all the nations. (I believe Perspectives is a must for every Christian—find one near you!)

The lesson I taught was Lesson #4: God’s Mandate to the Nations. I wanted to share a section out of what I taught that night. I attempted to bring out what the Bible reveals about Jesus’ heart as He was facing the cross. John 17 

A.W. Tozer once wrote that “the most important thoughts that a man thinks are his thoughts when he thinks about God.” 

He was speaking to the reality that our view of God, whether high and exalted, or low and common, impacts every perspective in our lives. 

—If we could get one of the most intimate glimpses of a person—any person—it might be their heart crying out to God as they know they are facing death. —With this one Person, distinct and set apart from all other men—What would His heart cry be in this most secret and intimate time alone with His Father as He is facing death? 

—Jesus has lived among HIs disciples for over three years now. They have walked with Him daily. They have heard hundreds of hours of His teachings and lessons. 

—They have seen Jesus responding to His harshest critics. They have seen Jesus responding to God-fearing peoples. They have seen Jesus responding to the marginalized and outcast of society. 

—They have seen Him turn water into wine at a wedding party. They have seen Him walk on water. They have seen Him heal people with sicknesses, deformities, demons, and leprosy. They have seen Him raise people from the dead. 

—And now we come to the end. Jesus knows His time has come that God’s will for His life come to the part where He will be betrayed and captured and crucified. 

**At the end of such a powerful story and powerful life—What would be the weighty matter on Jesus’ mind as He knows what will happen in the next few days? 

**With all that His mind could be going through—What is it His mind is fixed and focused on? 

The Answer: His disciples. 

At such a crucial and incomparable weighty and strategic time—Jesus’ heart is fixed on His glory and the Father’s glory being displayed through these lowly men’s lives as they were captivated in Christ. 

John 17:1  “Father, the hour has come. Glorify Your Son, that Your Son may glorify You.”

Jesus is well aware of the dreaded cross He is about to face. He has discussed His upcoming betrayal and death several times at this point with His disciples. None of them fully grasping the weight of it. 

Yet, facing that hour, He says, “Glorify Your Son.” That is an insanely ridiculous statement if not uttered through the very Son of God. It is not “glorifying” for any father to crush their innocent son to death for the guilt of others. Yet Jesus equates His future sufferings and death as a means to glorify not only Himself—but His Father as well—“that Your Son may glorify You.” 

John 17:3  “Now this is eternal life; that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom You have sent.”

Many a preacher and person have described eternal life in completely different ideas. Many people think the highest goal of eternal life is being re-united with former loved ones. Others need juvenile accounts to assure them that heaven is going to be fitting enough for them. 

Jesus has a clear view of eternal life: It is knowing God the Father and the Son He has sent…period. Those who understand this God do so because they have understood the Son and the Son being sent for one purpose. That purpose was to seek and save the lost and reconcile God and man even though man’s sin had separated each one of us an eternal placement apart (2 Cor. 5:21). 

The purpose of Jesus coming was as a propitiation to purchase salvation(1 John 2:2; 1 John 4:10)—His innocence taking on the wrath of God for our guilt of sin. Those who understand that deeply view heaven along with Jesus as the immeasurable privilege of savoring time with this Godhead “face to face” for all eternity (1 Cor. 13:12). 

Therefore, in Jesus’ summation, the greatest treasure of heaven is not the scenery nor people nor loss of pain nor even absence of sin. The high and exalted glorious treasure and pleasure of heaven is God Himself. Nothing else. Not “God…and.” Not “God…plus.” Clarity. Immeasurable intrinsic weighty glory. God Himself is the reward. 

So Jesus starts out this beautiful prayer asking for God’s glory to be displayed and with a clarity on what true eternal life is. 

John 17:4 “I have brought You glory on the earth by finishing the work You gave Me to do.”

Notice Jesus is not speaking or referring to His work of atonement on the cross. Later on, in Jesus last words, Jesus says, “It is finished,”(John 19:30) and then dies. At that point, the “finished” work is justification. At that point on the cross, Jesus clarifies a different completed work. The completed work of justification (salvation) bought by Jesus’ death was a one time event. Jesus’ cross “work” is the most intensively astounding event that has happened in all of eternity. God, the perfect, holy One, died. 

Holy God died for wretched, filthy, murdering, lying, molesting, raping, gossiping, thieving, jealous, arrogant, proud, self-righteous, drunken, sexually immoral, debased, religious and non-religious man. That is the result of Jesus “finished” work on the cross. 

But back in our text, John 17:4, Jesus stresses another work He has “finished” for the glory of God. It is pouring His life and teachings and attitude and treatment of others into the hearts of His closest followers. John 17 reveals Jesus’ elevated and brilliant plan of investing in a few that is still spreading to this day. 

In the next 22 verses, Jesus refers specifically to His closest disciples over 45 times. That’s right. Over 45 times. Some people have thought this prayer was focused on the world and all those who would ever be reached by the gospel. But Jesus even clarifies twice, “I am not praying for the world” (17:9) but instead is praying specifically for His disciples, and later distinguishes by praying “for those who will believe in Me through their message,” (17:20). 

Three years earlier, Jesus had chosen these twelve men to be His closest companions. He had called them to “be with Him.” Jesus calls them to follow Him and become “fishers of men” (Mark 1:17).  

Later, after His crucifixion and resurrection, as He is about to ascend to heaven, Jesus tells them that they are to “be My witnesses in Jerusalem, Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth” (Acts 1:8). 

Essentially, Jesus is letting them know that their lives are now going to be all about Him. And this fits since His earlier estimation of that which entails eternal life is the reward of God Himself. Therefore, if eternal life is all about God, life on this planet would be all about God as well. 

Jesus’ focus and heart is revealed in His prayer. He has revealed by spending the greatest majority of His time, teaching, and life as pouring into men—not organizing events for people to gather around. Jesus envisioned a movement and force that “the gates of hell could not prevail against” (Matt. 16:18). The “gates” Jesus spoke of were not on the offensive. In Jesus’ mind, His Kingdom would be on the offensive taking back captives that are held in darkness behind the “gates.” 

Jesus didn’t expect those behind the gates to come out on their own or even desire to without a clear gospel message that would free them. He expected His Kingdom to advance the gospel by making disciples just like He had commanded (Matt. 28:18-20) and just as He Himself had exampled. 

It cannot be put any more clearly. What could Jesus possibly have done to get us to see that making disciples—investing in a few people—with gospel intentionality with our eyes looking upon all of lostness as an area of mission. It was supposed to be communities on mission instead of thinking the mission is creating community. True community will develop, but in process of continuing to make disciples of all peoples. We don’t stop once we’ve developed a little bit of community—whether that a few hundred or a few thousand. 

Jesus’ life revealed that making disciples was His plan for extending the gospel message to all peoples. 

Jesus’ prayer in John 17 (and others) reveals His heart’s desire to see His message internalized in captivated followers who would live for one holy passion in all peoples. 

Jesus’ command in Matthew 28 and Acts 1:8 reveals His command on high from the Father, empowered by the Spirit, to make disciples of all peoples and nations. 

So, how are we doing at this clear task?

How much of our time is spent in the busy-ness of Christianeze?

Are you making disciple by investing in a few?

Maybe these help us answer the question, Am i really captivated in Christ and what He has done? 

Let us examine our hearts and lives to see where we betray and live in disobedience to this mandate. Let us repent and pray for the Holy Spirit to stir us. Let us say no to the good things to be able to say yes to investing in a few. 

Sankie P. Lynch

www.nbchurch.info

www.nbfamilies.info

sankie@nbchurch.info

Faith and Family

My level of faith continues to grow as I get older. I have seen more, experienced more, learned more about how God is working in my life, in and through my children, my wife, my family and friends. Now that I have turned 50 years old  and having more grandchildren come into the family, I seem to be spending more time reflecting on the past. However, I am also looking forward to the future. In the past, I was looking forward to the future and trying to forget the past. You can't do anything about the past anyway, so why dwell on it, right?

I see the direction of the Family Ministry model at New Beginnings and I have my own regrets about the things that I could have or should have done with my children as they were growing up. Now they are adults and some are now having their own children. So in this reflecting process I am reminded about what kind of parent I was when I was their age.

Here is one of the things that I have learned that I wish I would have known early on in my parenting. Parenting is a life long process. It doesn't end when the children turn 18.The little things that you may not think are making a difference will make a difference over time.

Some examples of those "little things" are having Faith Talks and Faith Walks with your children and creating milestone events that make memorable moments for you and them, that they want to pass down to their children, with hope that those things will get passed on to their children, etc. The hard part in the process is that we parents get busy. Busy with life, job pressures, relationship pressures, time pressures and then time slips away and before you know it, your children are now teenagers and then adults. Will you stay the course? Do you believe it will make a difference? You may not see immediate changes in your children. You may not see immediate changes in your teenagers. But will you have enough faith, that God will help you in the process, IF you remain faithful in doing your part too?

Most Christians know this verse that defines the word "faith"  from Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is the reality of what is hoped for, the proof of what is not seen."

But not many may know the "why" explained in the very next verse in Hebrews 11:2   "For our ancestors won God’s approval by it."

 Will our children and grandchildren and great grandchildren be saying the same thing about their ancestors?

  

 

It’s Happening Again…

Well, kids and parents alike know it’s coming. Most people are dreading it. There are a few who appreciate the structure more so they like the days ahead. But most of the parents we’ve talked to lately are definitely not looking forward to it. That’s right. I’m talking about school starting back. 

School would be great if you could keep the same attitude and schedule of summer. Things get too difficult in the schedule?—go chill beside the pool for a while. You’ll feel better. Kids getting too loud?—turn up the iTunes beside that pool. Frantic pace of driving little people around to practices, events, functions, and games got you stressed just thinking about it?—Take a swim at the lake and let the burdens wash away with the ripple of the waves up close to the sunset. Summer has it’s own attitude. Summer has it’s own schedule. 

We’ve talked to many parents, who, like us, have been more laid back in our schedule over the summers. We let the boys stay up a little later in the summer (if you’re judging already you may want to hit that red “x” in the top corner). It starts out sounding like a good idea, “a little extra time watching movies or grabbing a snow cone late as a family,” turns into a bad version of “Lord of the Flies.” We hang out with several couples and they get to stay up later there also. They still only get to play “devices” on weekends and for limited times. But those limited times seem like they’ve stretched over the summer (again if you’re annoyed at my parenting the little red button helps). We’ve probably had close to too much sun and too much fun—if that’s possible. 

We’ve got to point them to some of our favorite evidences of God’s beauty and power in watching simple sunsets over the water and trees at the lake. It may not be a scheduled “Faith Talk,” but those “God Moments” are worth pausing and sharing when they explode right before your eyes. 

If you remember a couple of months back as summer began, I wrote a blog about how we as a family were going to slow down our pace—to work on God’s idea of “rest” and to truly try to enjoy this time in life with these little ones. It is passing so fast and we don’t want to live with regrets later on. We don’t want to have the regret of too much time spent pursuing other things when the most valuable things were right in front of us—but we were too “BUSY” doing so much “for them” that we missed actually being “with them.” They don’t really need all that busyness either. The polls and studies show that even awkward teens would be open to doing things together if it were truly some sort of quality time—not merely rushing to the next forced calendar event. 

We also intentionally planned on spending more time building relationships and getting to know people better. We’ve got to spend lots of quality time with many new and old friends over coffee, dinner, time at the lake, and poolside. And as I stated in last week’s blog, after assessing our decision to simplify, rest, and enjoy where God has us in this season of life, Jamie said, “This is probably the best summer we’ve ever had.” 

We purposefully checked out of any activities or sports. We truly wanted to enjoy our family and the people we’ve built relationships with as we’ve moved to South County. We’ve stuck to our plan and you know what…it’s been incredible! 

Who would have thought that simplifying your life, working hard and learning to rest well would actually be rewarding and enjoyable? 

But we’re not alone. Some of you have also failed at parenting in many forms this summer. And like us, you’re not wanting the later nights to disappear. But oh how they’re going to disappear! Those little mongrels don’t bathe or feed or dress themselves ya know. They require more maintenance…more guidance…more structure…more parenting. They suck the life out of you! I’m convinced they devise plans and team up with secret stashes of Mountain Dew tucked away in their rooms somewhere. So what do you do when you’ve relaxed the schedule more than you had planned and you’ve dropped some of your more structured intentional parenting over the summer? 

Here’s a handful of ideas to get you back to a more intentional and purposeful plan.  

Concerning Family Worship

1. Be intentional with a workable plan—and then make that plan work itself out into the practical daily, weekly, monthly schedule. 

• Need an idea of a plan--check this out--NB Faith Map. 

• “A good plan today is better than a perfect plan next week.” —Josh McPherson (Grace City Church-Wenatchee, Washington)

• We often think we have to have all the questions answered and all the variables thought through and nailed down into a perfect plan. But you’ll never get started if you’re waiting on all the perfect pieces to fall into place. You’ll always feel inadequate spiritually guiding your children. You’ll never know all the answers to all the questions. But you don’t have to. Just get a simple plan and then stick to that plan. 

• “Perfection can be the enemy of progress. One step of action today is better than a perfect plan next week or month.” —Brian Howard

Do you have a plan for your family? Or are you merely full of good intentions for the upcoming semester? (Next thing you know it’s November and you’ve still not followed through)

2. Let the natural rhythms and passions of your life help you as a family—not hinder you. 

• Eating: You know your family has to eat. With a tiny bit of effort and planning you can redeem your families meals together and try to have several times each week where you eat meals together as a family. 

• Creative Energies: Let your kid’s passions and ideas lead to the parents joining them in those pursuits—not merely being a bystander, a critic, or a provider. Truly join them. Enjoy them in it—not merely the success or abilities they’re developing—but enjoy “them” in the process.

• Entertainment/Recreation: If your family loves football or snow skiing or hiking or Scrabble or watching family videos or golf—spend a bit more effort and think through how this could be a family thing you do together—not extended periods of silence and solitude away from each other. 

3. Let the gospel grow bigger and illuminate more of your thinking as a family. 

• Don’t try to be perfect. Jesus died and provided all that we could never have provided for ourselves. 
• Don’t try to have perfect kids. Jesus died and provided all that they needed and all they could never have done for themselves. 
• Don’t try to portray an image that is better than an unworthy, humbled, undeserving beggar in spiritual matters. “Blessed are the poor in spirit,” was the type of spiritual bankruptcy Jesus prescribed for all those who would recognize their great need for Himself. 
• Don't ever graduate Jesus and His cross.  

“Engaging your kids with gospel-intentional talk tonight is far better than a perfectly-crafted program for your family next month.”  —Brian Howard

4. Simply get into the Bible together. 

• The Bible is God’s very words to us that He chose, word for word, to bring self-disclosure to us. If God has spoken (He has/the Bible) then we should read it and study it and learn it and listen to it and memorize it and meditate it and pray it and trust it and live it and teach it diligently and talk daily and often of it throughout the day and discuss it thoroughly. 

• Many parents ask, “What should I start with in the Bible with my kids?” Or “We’ve failed at following through over long periods—so what can we do to be more consistent?” 

• Answer: Brian Howard has  a simple plan — “Read one chapter from the Bible each day."

• What if I don’t do it for several days? —Read one chapter today.

• Shouldn’t I go back and read several chapters to catch up? —Nope. Read one chapter today.

• What if I miss a whole month? —Read one chapter today.”

If there is something in our minds that keeps going back to that thought, "I always fail at reading enough...praying enough...having good enough quiet times..." it may be that you need to go back and stare at what Jesus accomplished on the cross on your behalf.  It had entirely nothing to do with you reading enough, praying enough, or having good enough anything to position you closer to Him. The fact that our minds and hearts want to use legalistic measurements that remove us from enjoying grace and enjoying Jesus should reveal to us how much we do not understand the gospel of Jesus Christ. Yes, reading and praying and silence before the Lord has endearing place--but only because of the Person and Power of the Christ. 

Take a deep breath. Lift your chin up. Swallow. You are going to fail and not follow through with several things this year--especially in the spiritual raising of your children. Jesus is their all-sufficient Savior. Not you their fallible, weak, sinful parent. Point them to Him. And fail. And fall short of expectations. And get up and point them to Him. Repeat. 

I hope you’re encouraged to kick off the new semester with a gathered since of purpose and some prodding thoughts of what you could do as parents to truly spiritually lead your family towards their only Savior. He is worthy of the difficult and tedious amounts of planning and scheduling. He is worthy of every breath and thought you will ever have—so why not pass Him on to the next generation so they can bask in the enjoyment of what He has accomplished for them on His cross. 

Sankie P. Lynch

Pastor of Families

www.nbchurch.info

www.nbfamilies.info

sankie@nbchurch.info

Once Dead…But Made Alive Through Christ

This past Sunday was one of the most incredible experiences of my life as a father. Getting to baptize our oldest son Sankie will remain as one of the most special events in my life. I hope to be able to do the same with Owen, Jackson and whoever this next one is!

Me baptizing Sankie II Easter Sunday

Jamie and I have prayed and prayed and taught and corrected and disciplined and trained and yet—none of that earns salvation for a child. So this is not a story of how great we’ve been as parents which equated to a kid getting to heaven. Instead, I hope you hear the screaming question of why so much grace? 

If we’re not careful, we begin to think that all our good efforts in parenting should bump us up on the list toward our children being saved. Now of course, we never verbalize that or allow ourselves to admit it. But it may be there nonetheless. Across the spectrum of evangelicalism (and cousin Charismatia) this expectation of “teaching them diligently” (Deut. 6:7) being completed in some equation to salvation may be seen in our frustrations or our impatience with our children. It may be detected in our desire to pridefully exhibit the perfect family image with quiet, still, smiling, clean, nicely-dressed little pictures of Godliness. God burst that bubble for us with child #1 in week #1—and continues to solidify with further examples! It may show up secretly as we jealously desire people to honor us and praise us as spiritual families. It may be seen with our contempt as we secretly point our finger in God’s face reminding Him of all we’ve “done” for Him with our children and service in the church. 

Again, none of that impresses Him on a resume for salvation. All our attempts at good parenting are also “as filthy rags” (Is. 64:6) when it comes to earning merit or God owing us something in regards to salvation. 

So, standing there looking down at the baptism tank as the boys were preparing for their time I had a screaming thought blaring in my head…”WHY?” 

Testing the waters

Why so much goodness and grace poured out on a little guy who deserves nothing but wrath? 

Why so much mercy for seven years of rebellion against God’s commands? 

Why would God receive my son unto salvation when literally billions of people across the planet have not heard the name of Jesus nor the salvation He offers? 

Why so much love and grace poured out on such unsuspecting souls? 

Baptism screams at us the reality of God’s amazing grace. Ezekiel 37 tells the ridiculous story of dry bones miraculously being brought back to life as God is showing off His infinite power and supremacy above all things. I call it ridiculous because it is ridiculous for man to believe in spiritual rebirth (“born-again”) if not for a God who commands it and it happens according to His word. God is the only one who can bring dead souls to eternal life. God is the only one who has the power to make all things re-created in His Son’s likeness. Baptism should halt us and help us to think through and appreciate the grace of God in the great news of the gospel story. 

Sankie, Chandler, and Noah

All the teachings, prayers, lessons, Faith Talks, Faith Walks, God-moments, and Bible readings do not save. They bring the good news of the gospel into the environment of the child. God, the Holy Spirit, breathes new life as the words of the gospel are articulated in the child’s hearing and sight. God is the only one who saves. 

Baptism is a beautiful picture meant to show that a person who was once “dead in trespasses and sins,” (Eph. 2:1) has been brought into eternal life through what Christ accomplished on the cross. 

A person formerly facing God’s wrath as rebels to His will now reconciled and adopted as a child of God. Where formerly they were lost in darkness pursuing their own way—now brought into the light. Where formerly they were guilty—now because Jesus took on their guilt—they are now pronounced “NOT GUILTY!” Solely because of what Christ did on the cross. 

Once the Holy Spirit gives understanding to these truths and brings repentance and faith, the person is re-created internally with a new heart that desires to follow God’s law. This is the internal heart change wrought by the Holy Spirit of God. 

Baptism is an outward expression proclaiming the great news that this person has been forgiven of sins (1 Pet. 3:18; Col. 1:13-14), justified by Christ (1 Cor. 6:11; Rom.8:30; Rom.5:9; Rom.5:1), adopted as children of God (1 John 2:28–3:3), and reconciled completely to God (2 Cor. 5:17-20). 

Baptism does not save at all. There is nothing salvific about baptism. The water of baptism does not wipe away or wash away sins. Sins are completely and entirely forgiven by Jesus’ death on the cross. Baptism is not the “second requirement” of salvation. Salvation is by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone through His cross. There will be many people in heaven who were not baptized in water. There will also be many people in hell who had been baptized in some manner while on the earth. But baptism does not save. 

Baptism is one of two ordinances given to the church (the other being the Lord’s Supper) to be performed repeatedly by local assemblies of believers to proclaim the death and resurrection of Jesus to the world around us until He returns. Individuals who put their trust in Christ’s atoning work on the cross are commanded to be baptized afterwards. 

So what about baptizing children? 

There has been much discussion with varied stances concerning how appropriate it is to baptize young children—especially children under the age of ten. Now for many of you, that may be “new” news to you. Some people are outraged when I even bring up the fact that people have questioned baptizing five and six year-olds. Over the last sixty years, the number of baptisms do not equate with the number of people who continue to participate in church. The growing concern has been that many people make “false professions” of faith either as a child at a young age or as a teen-ager. Over time, pastors and theologians have asked if baptism gives people a false sense of security or a false belief that they are going to heaven once they are baptized. That problem is not solved by taking away the water of baptism, which is in accordance with God’s word. That problem is a much larger discipleship problem throughout the church. 

Some churches have decided they would set a certain age as the first eligible age for baptism (for example 12 years). The thought is that younger children (5-10 yr-olds) will have more time to sort of “give evidence” to their salvation. Everyone knows that it’s very difficult to see how much “lifechange” truly occurs in a five or six year-olds life. They don’t turn from drug abuse, sexual immorality, and debauchery at those ages. Some churches have even set the number as high as sixteen. Many of those churches who set numbers have gone back and removed the limitation because, Biblically speaking, you will become more pressed to show how forcibly delaying and restricting baptism to certain ages is more in line with orthodoxy. The Bible seems to point to more immediacy. Parents also become very frustrated when a child makes a profession of faith at six or seven and the church then tells them they have to explain to their child that they have to wait six more years for baptism. Again, you may find yourself justifying how you are a stumbling block to a child’s desire for obedience in baptism!

Matt baptizing Chandler Easter Sunday

I personally appreciate looking at baptism as an outward step of obedience in accordance with Scriptural commands (Acts 2:38; Matt. 28:18-20). I believe we can look at a younger professing believer’s intent and desire for obedience through baptism to be considered much like a “letter of intent.” For all their present understanding and ability, they believe God has saved them from their sins and to the best of their ability they desire to live for Jesus in obedience to His Lordship. Baptism is their first public proclamation that they love Jesus and understand He saved them in His death and resurrection. As stated many times, “from dead in trespasses and sins, raised to walk in newness of life,” (Eph. 2:1; 2 Cor. 5:17). Baptism is the visible outward picture of what has happened internally in the heart. 

So, yes it is hard to discern. But if we believe that that first initial “response” or some sinner’s prayer at the front pew of a church is all we’re banking on, then we are the ones needing more help. Is there follow through and continuous discipleship going on before, during, and after a profession of faith is made? Are we teaching them what following Christ looks like and how it is lived out—or are we finished once they pray the prayer? Again, this is a much deeper problem of discipleship within the church at large. 

I do believe churches have done much harm in having people walk an aisle—asking people to get baptized when they’ve never yet asked them if they understand the gospel and salvation. 

I’m extremely encouraged to see many churches implementing a process or a class for younger children to go through to communicate, to the best of their ability at that age, what they believe has happened to them in salvation, what they believe the gospel message is, and what baptism is and is not. At least someone is asking them 1) if they’ve been saved and 2) what they believe that means. Bethlehem Baptist Church (Children Desiring God) has a helpful tool titled, Preparing Young People for Baptism. 

Steve baptizing Noah Easter Sunday

Our church, New Beginnings, uses Lifeway’s resource, I’m A Christian Now! We have a couple, the Bowman’s, who teach through six weeks of the class repeatedly clarifying the message of the gospel, what it means to agree with God about our sin and need for Him, what it means to believe in the true offer of salvation in Christ, and what it means to confess our faith in Christ. This little book has some simple truths about baptism itself as well as Communion and other important truths about the church. There is also a second book that follows up after their baptism to help them learn how to follow Christ. 

We have added a time at the completion of this class where I meet with the parents and the child desiring baptism. The six weeks leading up to this are extremely beneficial for being able to articulate their beliefs as well as clearing up any confusion they have on any number of things. I am able to hear from the parents their own assessment of the child’s profession as well as whether they’ve seen marked “Godly sorrow” as described in 2 Cor. 7 that results in a repentant heart. Again, we cannot judge hearts on salvation. We miss it even when we start inspecting fruit. But this is a good step that doesn’t postpone those desiring obedient baptism for five to seven years while at the same time providing a time of clarifying gospel-fluency and understanding of personal salvation. 

Sankie P. Lynch

Pastor of Families

www.nbchurch.info

www.nbfamilies.info

sankie@nbchurch.info

How Did We Get Here?

I have just finished three out of four trainings for parents of Genesis Preschool and Genesis Kidz in our Parent Equipping Class. I’ve been so excited to finally get with many of the parents who have children in those two areas. It is so encouraging to see so many parents truly desiring to lead their families according to God’s plan laid out in Deuteronomy 6:1-9. 

With both groups of parents I’ve asked the question, “How many of you grew up in homes where you were truly discipled by your parents in the Deuteronomy 6 fashion?” 

Out three classes and over 60 people there has been one person to raise their hand. 

Now, that doesn’t mean that those adults were not raised by well-intentioned Christian parents. Many of these adult parents were raised inside the church walls. But the point is Deuteronomy 6 lays out God’s intentions for producing spiritual offspring who treasure God as the most significant thing to live for. 

So WHY have so many parents not looked to God’s design for raising their children?

There are a number of contributing factors—but here’s two of the most concerning: 

1. Shifts in Culture
2. Church Leaders Accommodating Culture

Here’s what I mean by that. 

• First, shifts in culture have allowed parents to become so preoccupied with a plethora of limitless activities that there is no longer a central “main thing” they are trying to point their children to live for. Deuteronomy 6 lays out the “main thing” to be “The LORD is one; Love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.” When our kids graduate and leave home to start their own lives—they need to know that was the “main thing” to live for no matter what vocation and location they arrive at. 

• Second, churches have failed to acknowledge to the parents their God-ordained responsibility of being the ones who lead their children spiritually. Instead, churches have tried to accommodate busy consumeristic trends and slip in twenty minutes of teaching about God on Wednesday nights and during Sunday school hour. 

• Furthermore, churches have not equipped, trained, nor brought encouragement and accountability for those parents to fulfill their role in spiritually raising their families. Churches began to ask, “What does it take to keep people coming?” Or “What would it take to get more people to come?” Instead of asking, “What has God told us to communicate and train believers to do as image-bearers in Christ’s Kingdom in a culture separated from God?” The answers to those questions take people in two completely different directions. 

{Two resources with much information on both of these factors: Timothy Paul Jones Family Ministry Field Guide (Indianapolis: Wesleyan Publishing House, 2011). And Randy Stinson & Timothy Paul Jones ed. Trained in the Fear of God: Family Ministry in Theological, Historical, and Practical Perspective (Grand Rapids: Kregel, 2011). }

So, how did these shifts in culture and church accommodation come about? Below are some factors that I received in a class (Leadership & Family Ministry) at Southern Seminary that lays out how we have arrived at this current era in the western church. 

HISTORICAL, SOCIAL, AND CULTURAL FACTORS

In the Hebrew/Jewish culture, the father was ACKNOWLEDGED/EXPECTED to be the spiritual leader of the family.

This was carried over from Judaism when those of “the way,” early Christianity, began to develop. There was already, in Judaism, an expectation for parents to train their children in the fear and understanding of the Lord. Now, that included a more complete understanding with Jesus and His cross as the complete fulfillment of that teaching. 

Early writings: (Didache, Polycarp, and letters of Barnabas) reveal that it was common for the parents to be intentional in leading their children in the ways of the Lord. 

Shepherd of Hermes (mid 2nd century) “God is angry with you in your neglect of spiritual training of your children in the home.” 

John Chrisostom “Just as we see artists in great precision, so we must care for these wonderful statues of ours. Being sculptors we remove what is unhelpful and add to what is lacking…so that we may fulfill their purpose. Give up your leisure time to fashion tees wonderful statues God has given to us…make them athletes for Christ…”

Martin Luther (1500’s) “We must improve and elevate children as it was done of old, where it was the job of the father to give more care and equipping to his children than of his own body.” 

Richard Baxter (Puritan Pastor/Theologian) “Spiritually leading your children will not only spare you much labor, but multiply your labors incredibly.” 

Jonathan Edwards (Pastor/Theologian) “Every family should be, as it were, a little church. Family education and discipleship are some of the chief means of grace.” 

HISTORY OF CULTURE & YOUTH/CHILDREN

(How did we get to this point?)

Horace Mann (1852) He pressed that every child must go to public schools in Massachusetts. “Education if equal for everyone, will draw property after it in all occasions. It is the great equalizer of conditions of men, the balance wheel of the social machinery.” 

Compulsory Education: It becomes a place, for the first time, where young kids become more influenced by their peer group (same age) instead of the family and a wider group of adults. (Apprenticeship fading)

Adult / Child Interaction: Up to this point, parents expected maturity for children was to be able to interact and respond with people of different ages, especially adults. After this shift in culture to children being separated for schooling, it became the expectation for them to interact with only their peers. 

**Do you see what is happening? Children are outside of the home and outside of the parent’s supervision and influence now more than ever. Children are interacting many more hours per week with children on their peer level without the influence of a parent throughout the day. This is a huge shift in the culture at this time.

Tax Dollars: (1870’s) The Supreme Court rules that high schools would be free of charge for all to attend. Education is free. Whether you sent your children or not—your taxes funded it. This was a big shift with lots of controversy. Public schooling is now paid for by taxes. 

G. Stanley Hall (1844-1944) He is a writer with enlightenment influenced thinking. There were two views popular at that time on evolution—1) Darwinian Evolution; 2) Lamarkian Evolution. Darwinian believed that the strongest will prevail. Lamarkian believed that certain traits would be passed on to children (father is a blacksmith/or butcher—children will have stronger arms, etc). This was proven wrong quickly. But G. Stanley Hall took this and applied it to raising children and specifically preteen and teen children. He believed, in his evolutionary leaning, that adolescents are in a “wild cave man” period of development. He taught that societies should allow kids to wander far and long enough to find the best habitat and experience things for themselves to be able to know what they want in life. This is the poster child for “Freedom Without Responsibility.” This relaxed view letting them find their own way with no responsibility and low expectation became the norm. 

The Great Depression: Truancy laws were imposed to move youth out of jobs and into schools in order to provide jobs for adults. This was mainly in more urban areas. This resulted in a huge number of youth being placed in school systems with a large number of their peers. This new and growing peer culture was surrounded by others with the same maturity of other peers with little interaction of a majority of adults. Parents (adults) became separated from their children in growing numbers—huge numbers. 

RECAP: So far, we’ve seen taxes paying for public school and large masses of children moving to the public system, youth removed from the work force to provide jobs for adults and at the same time provide safety in child labor laws, laws that require children to be in public school or other educational environment but not the working class, and deep, complex, far-reaching implications on the amount of time that young people spent with the adults in their lives. Time together as a family is being changed drastically. 

World War & Urbanization: As men came back from war and needed jobs, there was a large number of people that began migrating from rural areas to urban areas. Jobs were provided in larger cities and families began to move that way. Now we have more parents working away from the home in factories and other jobs, while at the same time growing numbers of children who would no longer follow their parent’s footsteps or career field. It would now be opportunity for them to “select” jobs that may be completely different than their father and grandfather’s work. 

Industrial Revolution and Capitalism: On the tails of the Great Depression, World Wars, and Urbanization, we saw a “pull up your bootstraps” mentality that vowed never to allow us to sink into a depression ever again. The economy and capitalism began to take shape like never before. This focused attention and drive to succeed financially and capitalistically was met with great success. But the drive for more opportunity and individual success also came at a great cost spiritually. 

Capitalism & Discretionary Spending: The success of capitalism led to a new realm of spending, discretionary spending—which in turn, led to more success in capitalism. The cycle of supply and demand was changed forever when hard-working people now had children, for the first time, with opportunity and provision to choose products that fit their own generational desires. For the first time, there was now money (for many) to provide much stuff that were “wants” and not necessarily “needs.” This was the first generation to get “spending money.” This is the dawning of “age-focused marketing.” Marketers found a completely new demographic to make money off of—products for children and youth on a much greater scale. These factors led to a new era in American culture with complete individualistic opportunity. 

Baby Boom & Middle Class: (1946-1964) Alongside the successive conquering of a Great Depression, two World Wars, Urbanization, the Industrial Revolution, and Capitalism, we have a new middle class that is able to spend much time pursuing and gaining individual items and goals. 

Generation Gap: Marketing turns to a generational focus. Each generation becomes increasingly disillusioned by the entertainment and social pleasures of the other generations surrounding them. The “yuck factor.” Parents were appalled and grossed out by some of the things youth began to spend their time on. Youth and children thought the things adults spent their time doing was incredibly unappealing. Older generational relationships (grandparents) were looked at as out of touch and irrelevant. Greater separation was happening between their likes and dislikes as entertainment based consumerism greatly influenced time spent away from other family members. Entertainment became increasingly generationally focused and then completely individualized. 

All of these factors greatly influenced the church and the way churches began to adapt to bring in specialized and generationally appealing methods. 

These are seemingly insurmountable cultural norms--but they don't have to be the norm for your family. Take back your home and take back your family's focus for the glory of God and a spiritual legacy that will have eternal enjoyment!

Sankie P. Lynch

Pastor of Families

www.nbchurch.info

www.nbfamilies.info

sankie@nbfamilies.info

FAILURE TO FANATIC

At New Beginnings, we want 2014 to be “The Year of the Faith Talk.” We want our people to take ONE SIMPLE STEP to see extensive change in our homes, church, and community. I just challenged a large group of our parents to consider taking what I call the “1.5.3 Challenge.”

“1.5.3 Challenge” 

1 Faith Talk = 1 night each week

5 Bible Stories = 5 nights each week

3 Prayer Times with spouse = 3 nights each week

That’s where I get the “1.5.3 Challenge.” I believe marriages, relationships with your children,  discussions, attitudes, behaviors, spiritual growth, whole families, whole churches, whole cities and cultural issues can see dramatic change if this were to take place across the board starting in one home after another. 

Here’s a good definition of Family Equipping: 

Family  Equipping Model: “The process of intentionally and persistently realigning a congregation’s proclamation and practices so that parents are acknowledged, trained, and held accountable as the persons primarily responsible for the discipleship of their children.”1

Notice the progression. 

Acknowledged. Equipped & Trained. Engaged. Encouraged & Accountable

FAILURE TO FANATIC—BUILDING A LEGACY

Apathetic Anderson—Let me introduce you to “Apathetic Anderson.” It’s not that Anderson is mean-spirited or moody in dealing with his children. It’s not that Anderson is emotionally or physically abusive to his children or wife. In fact, he’s been a great physical provider. He has worked long and hard at his career to provide an above average home and lifestyle for them. We all know Apathetic Andersons. Simply put, they abdicate their role in spiritual parenting with apathy, passivity, and uninvolvement. Each day, there is a loss of possible intimacy and spiritual depth that is passed over with their wife and children. Not surprisingly (except to Andersons), the children begin to develop desires to be known and understood by peers more than by Apathetic Andersons. 

Walk with me as we watch Apathetic Anderson move from a FAILURE TO FANATIC  by implementing  a very simple process. 

• STAGE 1: BLISSFUL IGNORANCE — Apathetic Anderson has never heard and never been shown in the Bible that it was his responsibility to spiritually lead his family. He simply assumed  it was the children’s minister or youth minister's job. He was BLISSFULLY IGNORANT.

• STAGE 2: ACKNOWLEDGED & EDUCATED— Apathetic Anderson then became aware of the Biblical responsibility that God lays out in Deuteronomy for all parents—not church staff. HIs pastor taught through Deuteronomy 6 showing that this was the main thing God wanted passed down from generation to generation from parents to children. Now he feels guilty, convicted, and fearful. Guilty because he sees he’s sinning against God in disobedience (omission). He’s convicted by the Holy Spirit to live according to this truth that is new to him. But he’s fearful because he’s never seen life done this way. He’s never seen a model of it. He’s never experienced this in a home. He is now ACKNOWLEDGED and EDUCATED through God’s word on the issue. 

• STAGE 3: FEARFUL RELUCTANCE TO…SEMI-FAILURE: He’s intimidated. He’s no Bible scholar. 
• What if his young kids ask questions he can’t answer? What if he makes mistakes about the Bible? Will he lose even more respect from his wife and kids if he messes this up too?

• So he’s reluctant to take steps of change. He’s also afraid of failure because he doesn’t know of a concrete, simple, workable plan that that he can pull of in his own home. But one of his pastors assures him that we only fail if we continue to abdicate our role and continue in passivity and apathy as spiritual leaders of those we’re responsible for. So he now knows God’s commands on it and he desires to become obedient—but he’s RELUCTANT. Often, the most difficult thing to do is that thing which we knew, all along, we should have been doing. 

• STAGE 4: EQUIPPED AND ENGAGED—He picks up a 15-week “Faith-Talk Guide” at his church’s Family-Equipping area. He now has simple, short, already prepared Bible studies that are less than a page long. They include simple questions he can use and even modify for different aged kids. He’s also picked up a “Faith Map” and stuck it on the fridge to keep the PROCESS in front of the family. 

• He and his wife decide on one night, Sunday nights, as their new “Family Faith Talk” nights. They plan on spending 10-15 minutes going through the simple Bible story, the main idea of the Bible passage, three or four easy questions that everyone can answer, a fun included activity that ties into the Bible lesson, and a time of prayer together. Anderson is now EQUIPPED with tools and a workable plan for his family inside the home. He now ENGAGES in their first “Family Faith Talk.” 

• STAGE 5: FORGETFUL FAILURE— Apathetic Anderson did great last week. He had responded to God’s word and led his wife and children through a Faith Talk and prayer time. They had planned on 10-15 minutes, but surprisingly, the kids really loved the Bible story and the four questions promoted about six other questions that mom and dad were able to answer. They even used the same lesson to start more discussion the next two evenings at dinner. It went great! Except—this week—he totally forgot to have the Faith Talk on Sunday night. It completely slipped his mind. And it wasn’t that it was not a priority—it’s the reality that it takes time and repetition to get anything to become a natural part of our schedules (diets, exercise, rest, etc). But now he felt like a failure. To make it worse, on Thursday, his five-year old asked, “Daddy, are we never going to do that Bible time again? Was it only one time?” Anderson now feels like a FORGETFUL FAILURE. How many other things has he started and not followed through with over the years? He fears this whole “Faith Map” and specifically “Faith Talks” will fall in the same category—even though it went really well. 

• STAGE 6: ENCOURAGING ACCOUNTABILITY—Apathetic Anderson brought up his feelings of failure as he met with one of the pastors and some guys in his D-group. They quickly reminded him that THIS IS A PROCESS. He didn’t fail simply because he started and forgot the next week. It’s like Michael Jordan shooting basketball. He’s going to miss (fail) on a lot of shots. But in the end, he’s known as a success because everyone remembers how consistent he was in making lots of shots. No one looks back and sees him as a failure and remembers him as “the guy who missed thousands of shots!” Everyone remembers him because of all the shots he made that counted. His group simply asked some questions about what he and his wife could do on Fridays to make sure they had the simple plan scheduled as a priority on Sunday. That way they wouldn’t forget or let other things marginalize their “Family Faith Talk.” He is now ENCOURAGED and HELD ACCOUNTABLE. 

FROM FAILURE TO FANATIC

• STAGE 7: LEAVING A LEGACY—Apathetic Anderson now spends just a few minutes on Friday or Saturday preparing for their Sunday “Family Faith Talk.” They make sure they set the time and communicate it to the children so everyone is anticipating their Faith Talk. They are now scheduling the priority of diligently teaching their children on God’s greatness. The next month, Anderson doesn’t miss a Sunday Faith Talk. The kids are now asking questions throughout the week about what they discussed on Sunday. Over the next six months, they missed only two or three Faith Talks on Sunday evenings. It became an enjoyable process where the family grew closer to God and one another. 

The story doesn’t end there. Fast forward twenty-five years later. Ole Apathetic Anderson’s four kids are now grown with small children of their own. Two of them live in the same city. The other two live about four hours away in another city. Some weeks, the two young parents who live nearby have Anderson and his wife over on Sundays after church. They have lunch together, go outside and play catch, go for a family walk (now proud grandparents, two of their offspring and their spouses, and six grandchildren), and finish the day with grandpa Anderson leading both young families in some of his favorite Faith Talks he’s collected over the years. 

And during the holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas, 4th of July) when grandparents and nearby families all travel to their other kids homes four hours away—they even try to have two or three nights in a row where they have a huge “Family Faith Talk” with grandparents, all four siblings now married, and twelve grandchildren. 

Apathetic Anderson is now a captivated fanatic about Family Faith Talks focusing on this Jesus who redeemed he and his family. 

That is how a person goes from failure to fanatic with a simple, workable plan to intentionally leave a spiritual legacy!

This is the type of environment and vision we’re asking God to create at New Beginnings. 

Sankie P. Lynch

www.nbchurch.info

www.nbfamilies.info

sankie@nbchurch.info

1. See Timothy Paul Jones Family Ministry Field Guide.