Isn’t it funny how something can be so simultaneously joyful
and saddening. I’m particularly thinking about the times when we notice just how
much our children have grown. It’s exciting to see them maturing and becoming
more capable young people, and yet it is difficult because it is a subtle reminder
that they’re not going to always be under our roof. Weekly they are developing
and gaining independence… And one of these days they will be gone. Although we
know this is ultimately a good thing and still a little while away, it is a
heavy thought to consider, especially when we begin to evaluate whether or not
we’re readying them well.
Here recently, it has been our oldest child, Brooks, who has
stirred these paradoxical feelings. He is a fifth grader that just recently
turned eleven. He is physically maturing right before our eyes daily and
apparently doing so with the metabolism of a hummingbird. Some days it costs as much
to feed him as it does the other four of us combined, and that is only a
slight exaggeration! Additionally, a couple months back, we discovered that
there is a state mandated HIV/AIDS education video that his school district
will be showing this week. This of course will cover some of the basics of
human anatomy and reproduction. While we can opt for him to sit out and not
participate, we have decided to send him. Between his lunchtime chats and discussions
during his bus ride commute, we figure it is inevitable that he will hear about
the topic of the video. And if that were to be the case, we would rather initiate and guide the conversation than allowing his pre-adolescent peers.
Bottom line is that the time to talk is now. Though we would love to
put the dialogue of purity and guarding his heart (Proverbs 4:23) off for another decade or so,
it just isn’t a reality. In this day and age our children are bombarded with images
and terminology that if not accompanied with truth, will negatively shape their
views of sexuality and marriage. In our culture sex is portrayed as either a bad thing
(something you shouldn’t ever do) or a trivial thing (just a physical act). The
Bible seems to express a far different message. It speaks of its beauty and
fullness when properly enjoyed between a man and his wife. In fact, Genesis
2:18-25 seems to describe it as an emotional and spiritual mingling of souls.
Brooks is just now starting to show an interest in girls and he is unable to
legally drive, so we’re not worried about him becoming sexually active in the
immediate future. However, we are concerned with helping position him for
success in regard to purity and his pursuit of Christ. That is, our role is to
teach him the skills and attitudes that will help him battle temptation well and
consistently deposit nuggets of scriptural truth down into his soul.
Okay honestly, that previous paragraph was tough to write. There was
a sentence that included our son’s name and the phrase “sexually active.” Yikes!! The truth is that we have to be willing to go to those uncomfortable places and have some awkward
conversations. We cannot keep our children sheltered forever. Dr. Tim Elmore
encourages parents to “think prepare, not protect.” He
goes on to say that “if we don’t spend time preparing, we will most assuredly spend time
repairing.” They'll not remain under our wing forever. As they grow
older, their time away from us will increase. Are we preparing them well for
those days ahead? Beginning a life-long open dialogue about faith, fears, and
everything in between is not only the best way to prepare them, it may be the only real protection we can offer. For my wife and
I, it would seem that the time to get involved is here.
Truthfully, the time is here for all of us. Whether you have
just recently become a new parent or you have a child that will soon be leaving the
house for college, now is the time for you both. We must remember the gospel
and always see the hope therein. For the good news of Jesus does not tell us to
get cleaned up and come to Him when we’re ready. It says to come as you are! If
we waited to be right and worthy before coming to God, we would never come.
With this in mind, please do not wait to get your life prettied up and holy
before you engage your children with truth of the scripture. If we postpone until then, they’ll be out the door before we even say a word. Yes, we must watch our
lives closely. Yes, we should strive to walk in the words that we profess.
However, if you think that it is your obedience and perfection that will save
your kids from harm, much more their eternal souls, you friend, have deceived
yourself. The hope for our children is the same as ours. It is dependent on the
faithful obedience and perfection of Christ and His sacrificial, full payment
that was made on our behalf through the cross. The truth is God loves our
children even more than us! He loves them perfectly…patiently. May His love
motivate us to play our role well and point our children back to Him. May we seek
Him for strength and creativity as we work to structure an atmosphere and environment
where each of our youth can thrive. Might we rest in knowing it is God that brings
the very increase we desire; for it is He who brings salvation and protection. And finally,
may we bravely step up to the challenge of the high calling before us and realize the time is now for us all.
 | |
|
No comments:
Post a Comment