How Much Would You Pay...

HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY FOR...

In the sermon this past Sunday at New Beginnings, http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/38455569 Pastor Phil Sallee brought up what he called some of his “favorite times.” He went on to explain that sitting around the dinner table over the years with his wife and kids were some of his favorite times in life. You may relate to that if you grew up eating meals together around the family table. I remember eating at the table with my mom and dad almost every night of the week. My three wonderful sisters were all graduated and moved out by the time I hit kindergarten, so it was mainly just me and my parents. We talked about our day, told stories, and laughed a lot. We didn’t know about the dangers of high-gluten diets. People in my hometown ate biscuits and gravy, bacon and eggs, hamburgers and french fries, and lots of fried chicken and mashed potatoes without ever knowing about those things they discovered in the 90‘s--trans fats and LDL’s. Of course, that was all before Pinterest. 

Cajun Boiling Pot--One of our favorites!

Think back to whatever your “family” looked like at the dinner table--whether it was a small number or a large number or whether there was always a couple of extras. The important thing was not a perfect family--but the fact that there was time for family. 

How much would you pay to have one week of family meals with your kids again or the family you grew up in? 

We have lost the art of the simple family meal. There are amazing statistics correlating the difference a few meals together around a table has on a child’s social, emotional, mental, physical, behavioral, and even spiritual well-being. As a kid, you don’t realize how much goes into that simple meal. The hours spent at work, the money from each paycheck to buy food, the time spent clipping coupons or online, the time spent shopping, the time spent cooking dinner, setting the table, the cleanup and dishes afterward. 

If you currently have younger children (or older for that matter) the family meal may be far from simple. For us, there have been times when meal time meant “War!” 

There are times when dealing with babies and toddlers at the dinner table seems anything but enjoyable--and far from righteous. When you’ve got a house full of noise and there seems to be a perpetual mess of toys and dirty clothes to sort through and put away--it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and exhausted. If we’re not careful, we spend a majority of time in frustration wondering if this thing called parenting will ever get better. And from what we’ve experienced and heard from others it continues to fly by so fast that you blink and those years are gone (add infinite country song titles). These times that God desired to be “favorite times” as Phil put it, end up in a blur of temper tantrums, fits of anger, blaming others, bitterness, and complaint--and that’s just the parent’s behaviors! 

Some of the things my heart complains about (repetitive correction, draining consistency, clarifying the gospel repeatedly upon sinful behavior, administering grace instead of rigid law) are really only blessings and gifts of time with our children. It’s a matter of perspective. Out of all the hours in each day, how many seconds and minutes are spent intentionally speaking eternal truths of the gospel into my children’s little faces? Sure, it means stopping and taking the time to show them where their heart has “missed the mark” (hamartano = sin) of God’s intended righteousness and that only Christ brings removal of our sin and His applied righteousness that perfectly “hit the mark” every time. But who would want to take the time to do that, right? Again, it’s a matter of perspective. It’s a gift of time with our children, from God, about God.

Jackson enjoying some Boiling Pot!

How much would you pay to have one week of family meals with your kids? For some of us that time is right now. For others that might mean stretching yourself to opening your home to those families who have no spiritual emphasis. 

The opportunity is before us to make the most intentional and eternal impact we can. That doesn’t mean you need to communicate God’s heart for the nations like John Piper or David Platt at your dinner table. That doesn’t mean you need to be as zealous as Francis Chan in your prayers at Chili’s. But it does mean that God called you, to be you, at the table with your family. They don’t need Piper at the table, God “determined the times and places {they} should dwell” (Acts 17:25-26) and He decided you were the perfect fit for your family. It was the wisest choice from the wisest and most powerful Being in the universe for you to be at that table with your family. 

As Phil took us back into his memories of those times at the dinner table you could hear a little tremble in his voice. He may have been fighting back tears at one point. This wasn’t an attempt to “connect to an audience.” This was a heart pouring out what God had revealed to him that life was truly all about--sharing life together--loving and enjoying one another and the God who created all of it. He then talked about how different it is for he and Carol to gather around that same table--and how different it is since those kids have grown up and moved on to start their own families. You think they (or a hundred other empty-nesters) wouldn’t pay two years worth of salary to have seven nights again with their children all under ten years old gathered around that table? (And for any in that category--we have three under seven for seven nights and we’ll only charge one year’s salary!)

Try to look at your schedule this week to see how many nights you gather to eat together around the table. Make it a priority. If you’ve lost that priority and older kids take a plate to their room or the family eats in isolation--just call them back together and tell them your intentions. You may be thinking, “Sankie, you have no idea what our evenings are like...this is impossible with our schedule!” I know that feeling--but we’re the ones in charge of our schedules. Some people's work schedule means a parent may not be present at dinner--so that doesn't mean you should feel guilty or feel like you're failing--it just means you get creative to have some set time with family at another setting. There are no hard lines or rules to stick your family into an equation. This is all about more grace and flexibility. Let’s make God the highest priority and prioritize Him in our schedule and see what happens with our family. 

How much would you pay for a few focused minutes to look into those faces and speak words of grace and share feelings of love this week?

BTW: How much would you pay to have one more week with your family at a great meal each night? Well, Jesus is preparing a feast for us. Except it won’t be for one week. We will continue to feast with Him for all of eternity. Can you imagine eating for all eternity enjoying the fellowship and unity and love of the saints of the church from all ages? Can you imagine the depth of love completely void of family issues, dysfunction, hurtful secrets, and painful pasts? Can you imagine our Host being the One who overcame all our sin and purchased our ticket to this eternal feast? He’s coming again. Soon. Lead your family (whatever that looks like) to great enjoyment and anticipation of Him in making Jesus the centerpiece of your times together at the table. 

Sankie P. Lynch