Healing for the crushed heart!

This is a photo-bombing family.

There is a very tragic story about a dysfunctional family in 2 Samuel 13-18. It is not hard to understand how a King’s family could become dysfunctional with all the difficult complexities. King David’s family suffered because a toxic mixture of political and military power, distasteful adultery, and conspiracy to commit murder. His multiple concubines, wives, and the resulting jealousy of half siblings created a poisonous concoction of chaos and hatred. There was not only hatred, but incestuous rape and a vengeful murder between King David’s children. It is an ugly story.

But the story gets uglier. Even after King David forgave his son, Absalom, for killing his half brother, Amnon, Absalom conspired to overthrow his father and assume place as King of Israel. This son’s wicked plan to overthrow his father includes telling lies about his father, infiltrating and poisoning the minds His father’s advisors, and building a militia to attack and kill his father. The bible says Absalom “stole the hearts of the men of Israel.” (2 Samuel 15:6)

How do you think this father responded to the revolting actions of his rebellious son? You would think that he would be angry and offended past the point of no return. Instead, King David gave his fighters strict orders not to harm his son. Even so, as the chaos of fighting often dictates, the factions battled and Absalom, King David’s son, was killed. No one wanted to approach the King because they knew how his heart would be crushed. Indeed, his heart was broken. Listen to the anguish in this father’s heart.

2 Samuel 18:29-33 The king asked, “Is the young man Absalom all right?” Ahimaaz replied, “When Joab sent the king’s servant and your servant, I saw a big disturbance, but I don’t know what it was.” 30 The king said, “Move aside and stand here.” So he stood to one side. 31 Just then the Cushite came and said, “May my lord the king hear the good news: today the Lord has delivered you from all those rising up against you!” 32 The king asked the Cushite, “Is the young man Absalom all right?” The Cushite replied, “May what has become of the young man happen to the enemies of my lord the king and to all who rise up against you with evil intent.” 33 The king was deeply moved and went up to the gate chamber and wept. As he walked, he cried, “My son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you, Absalom, my son, my son!”

Josh and I at the beach.

Three weeks ago, due to an emergency trip to California for the birth of my 2nd granddaughter, my son Josh and I had to spend Father’s day apart from one another. This was the first time that had happened in Josh’s entire life. We both detested being apart that day. I cant wait to see him at the end of this month (July, #Coufest).

I love Josh with a love that can’t be altered by behavior or circumstance. To be sure, Josh and I have had our ugly moments over the years (nothing even close to King David and Absalom). Neither of us are perfect. Josh’s biggest harms are ones that he directly inherited from me. But know this, there is nothing he has done, nothing he will ever do to cause me not to love him as much as I do. I think he feels the same way. This type of love is a redeeming Gospel-like love.

If you are disenfranchised from a parent or child, prove the power of the gospel and call them today. Life is too short and love is too deep. Forgive and move on.

Dr. Phil Sallee, Pastor
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