Are you Listening?

Deuteronomy 6:4

As I am writing this blog, I am resting at home waiting for another exciting night at Vacation Bible School. It has been a great week. There have been many things that I have been thrilled to observe:

• 250+ children laughing, playing, and learning together.
• 100+ committed volunteers working diligently to make a high octane VBS run smoothly.
• The church has been being the church - serving, worshiping, loving, laughing, and being together.
• I have been absolutely thrilled to watch our kids and volunteers enjoying a long, hot week together celebrating the kingdom of God.

There have been other things, however, that I have been disappointed to observe:

• Parents dropping off their kids so they can spend some quiet time away from them.
• After having asked kids, “What are some real fear that you have?” I heard several children say that they are afraid of their parents.
• Tonight, at VBS, is Parents Night (7:30, in the auditorium). I wonder how many parents will be too busy to join their children for “Parent’s Night” one night of the week?

I read a blog and it reminded me how important it is that we, New Beginnings Church, maintain our focus on family ministry. Thank you, Jay Strother, for your reminder of how important it is to listen.

Deuteronomy 6:4-7 “Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is One.

Deuteronomy 6:5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. Deuteronomy 6:6 These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart.

Deuteronomy 6:7 Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

The setting in which these words were delivered was one of the great scenes of Scripture. God’s people are poised for conquest, camped within sight of the long-promised land. Moses, now a seasoned leader who knows his days are numbered, gathers the people to remind them one last time what matters most. Recalling their struggles, Moses shifts his focus from codes and rules. Moses, inspired by the very Spirit of God, gives the people a single command that sums up all the statutes and ordinances in a single sweeping statement. This command isn’t aimed only at the head; it aims for the heart too:

“Listen, Israel; the Lord our God, the Lord is One. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and with all your strength. These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart.”

This passage is saturated with key relational words: “Listen!” “Love!” “Heart!”

• Listen.
• Listen to the timeless word of God, for “many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it’s the Lord purpose that prevails” (Proverbs 19:21).
• Listen to Solomon instructing us to “train up a child according to the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6). Could it be that God designed the home as the first and best “small group?”
• Listen to the Spirit-fueled words of Peter at Pentecost, who tells new believers that the promise of new life in Christ Jesus, the new covenant, is not just for them, but “for you and for your children” (Acts 2:39).
• Listen to single parents in forty percent of American homes who are struggling to pay the mortgage and to keep food on the table. Listen as they long for a compassionate church to surround their children with unconditional love.
• Listen to the parents who blindly accept the culture’s values for their children because the church hasn’t had the courage to teach them the truth.
• Listen to the parents who long to be spiritual leaders in their households but who have had no models-and who are spiritually intimidated by the so-called religious experts.
• Listen to studies that confirm our concern about the future of the Christian faith. Fewer individuals are affiliating themselves with any form of the Christian faith.
• Listen to the research that, despite several decades of innovation in providing a powerful church experiences for children and teenagers, young adults aren’t even able to articulate basic truths about the Christian faith.
• Listen to the growing chorus of children and student workers and ministers who are burning out beneath the weight of trying to do in the church what was designed to be done primarily in the home-disciple the next generation.
• Listen to the messages you are hearing, delivered daily by the parents, children, teenagers, community and church around you. Invite others to join you in praying and pondering.
• Listen to God speak. Then and only then will your plans line up with his.
• Listen.

VBS was a great experience. But we have so many more great things to look forward to. NBFamilies…the future is bright! The need is great. The Kingdom of God has come near! Listen!

"Dad, you taught me..."

About 3 weeks ago on a Sunday morning, I awoke early to these words running through my head: "Dad, you taught me." Those words were going through my head, over and over again. I began asking myself, why were these words running through my head non-stop and then I remembered Fathers Day was coming up. I began to think about my dad, and as those words were running through my head, I began to think about all of the things my dad has taught me throughout my life, both good and bad. I thought about the fact that my dad is getting older and that I didn't want to wait until he was gone to not only reflect on those things he has taught me, but to tell him how thankful and blessed I was to have him as my dad while he was still here.

 

 So, as Father's Day approaches, I decided instead of sending my dad a Fathers Day card this year, I would write some of those things down and send him those in a letter

(it's already in the mail on it's way).

 

As you read, maybe something will stir in your heart about some of the things your dad has taught you over your life. And to remember to honor your father, as we are commanded (Exodus 20:12) and if you are a father yourself, to remember the kind of impact you are making with your children over a lifetime. I would also like to note that my dad was not the spiritual leader of our home. For most of my childhood and early adult years my dad was an alcoholic. However, my dad still went to church every Sunday. So, I knew that church was important to my dad and I did learn that from him, but that is not the way I would have preferred to learn about God from my dad. I would have preferred that my dad been more involved in teaching me about God and how to be a Godly man, but it didn't happen that way for me. Fortunately, I became born again at age 28 and by the grace of God my dad is now born again and been free from alcohol for over 20 years now. Even though my dad was not a spiritual leader in my life, I am still very thankful for all of the things my dad did teach me, qualities that I have developed only because of him.

Here are just a few of things from my letter to my dad:

Dad you taught me…how to enjoy the game of baseball, from learning how to throw and hit and to catch, to how to pitch and to understand the strategy of the game. You taught me how to pick a winning professional team who had a winning tradition. You also showed me the good and the bad side of coaching little league and that if it wasn’t for dealing with the parents, you would have really enjoyed teaching and coaching the kids. You taught me how to play hard, to shake off the mistakes and to get up and try harder. You taught me that you really cared about the kids on the team, whether they had a father at home to help them, and if they didn’t you made sure to make the extra effort with those who didn’t. And you even cared about the kids on the other teams and how their parents treated them while they were on the field, especially the ones who coached their own kids and yelled and screamed at them. You taught me that the parents should not be treating their kids that way in sports and then you showed me by your actions what the appropriate way was to treat your children when they were playing the game.

Dad you taught me how to ride a bike and how to change the chain when it came off the bike. You taught me how to handle tools as simple as a screwdriver to how to use a soldering iron. You taught me responsibility when I tried my first job running a paper route. Dad you taught me how to handle money and you taught me how to handle customers through the way you handled customers, with honesty and integrity. You taught me how to work hard by the way you worked hard.

Dad you taught me how to fish and how to bait a hook and to skin a fish. Dad you taught me the importance of spending time with family by taking me fishing. You also taught me the same thing by taking me golfing.

Dad you taught me how to garden, even though it was not my interest or passion, you showed me by your passion that to have a hobby you enjoy is important, especially a hobby that provides fresh vegetables.

Dad you taught me how to love listening to music because you loved listening to music.

Dad you taught me about televisions, electronics and appliances because you were in that business.

Dad you taught me how to run a lawnmower and how to mow the lawn.

Dad you taught me how to drive a car and how to take care of a car.

Dad you taught me your respect for your father and mother, by the time you spent with them, to respect my grand- parents and to treat them with honor and respect and to spend time with them. And by all of this, you showed me how important family is.

Dad you taught me how to have courage, strength and a never give up attitude by you winning the toughest battle of your life, by never giving up, as I watched you deal with alcoholism for years until you were finally able to defeat the enemy from within.

Dad you taught me how to care for your wife up to her final breath, with grace and love and dignity.

Dad you taught me how to be a “good man” by showing me what a “good man” should be and you told me about your father and how he was such a “good man” and I got to witness that in my Grandpa Paul and those experiences with you and Grandpa Paul made me want to be a “good man” too.

So, on this Father’s Day of June 16th, 2013, when I am about to turn 49 years old, I am sure that I could think of a number of other things that you taught me over my 49 years, but I wanted to tell you that a lot of the qualities of what you see in me were developed over the years because of you Dad. I am so blessed that God made you my Dad. 

 

 

What is this 'Reel Time'!?

My name is Jeff Berg and I am the Family Pastor of High School here at New Beginnings.  In short, this means I have a HUGE passion and wonderful privilege of coming alongside you in serving you on this crazy journey of discipleship of your teen (for more visit our website: www.nbchurch.info and click on ‘About’ and then ‘Staff’). 

Beginning next week (May 29^th) our annual summer program (Reel Time) is back!!  I am very passionate about this program for many reasons.  It happens every Wednesday night, at our usual time (6:30-8:30p, doors open at 6p) and we will watch blockbuster movies.  Bottom line; statistics say, “90% of teenagers spend 20-40 hours a week in front of a screen…” That is a lot of time watching movies, television and videos!  While most kids simply ‘check their brains at the door,’ Reel Time is set up to help teens bring Light to the lies of Hollywood.

Details I want everyone to be aware of:

-       The Goal: To give teens the skills to watch movies with a filter (helping them find the lies Hollywood is trying to sell them and find redeeming qualities to share their faith with others)

-       Every Wednesday this summer (May 29^th – Aug. 14^th), in the Loft (the 4^th floor of New Beginnings: 4104 East 151^st Street South) starting at 6:30pm (Some nights may run longer than others because of the differing lengthes of the movies and the discussions that follow)!!

-       Here’s this summer’s movies and their main discussion points:

o   3:10 to Yuma* (Keeping your word)

o   Beware of Christians (What do you believe)

o   Cider House Rules (Abortion)

o   Hotel Rwanda (Genocide)

o   Minority Report (Free-Will)

o   Perks of Being a Wallflower (Acceptance)

o   Pitch Perfect (Student Life)

o   Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (Youth Culture)

o   Stranger Than Fiction (Purpose of Life)

o   The Truman Show (What is Real)

o   Unforgiven* (Forgiveness)

o   The Way (Legacy)

*R-Rated films will be viewed through our ClearPlay unit (www.clearplay.com)

**There will be a weekly sheet covering the plot of the film & follow-up quetsions

We understand that movies are possibly a major issue in your home.  Please pray that our time would be effective in supporting what you are already teaching at home and that God would use this as another way to train students in finding real Truth.  Also wanted to point out three great resources in regards to media (these are great sites to read up on everything media in student’s lives):

- www.PluggedIn.com

- www.TheSource4Parents.com 

- www.IMDb.com  (Most movies have a "Parent's Guide" section under "Storyline")

   

Finally, let me say thanks… Thank you for not only entrusting us with your most prized possession, but also thank you for being in your teen's life and caring enough to know more about this program.  I would not only be happy to discuss any aspects of our ministry but would love to get to know you and better understand how I can come alongside you in support and help.  Feel free to contact me and we can set up a time to meet.  

**PARENTS: Would you like a copy of my notes or the 'Faith Talk' sheet for Parents from each of the movies we watch (or past movies we have seen)... Just shoot me an e-mail (jeff@nbchurch.info)!! 

Kingdom Rocks!!

In the year of our Lord, 2013 New Beginnings has put on, yet again, a hugely successful Vacation Bible School: Kingdom Rocks!!  

 An amazing team of volunteer workers put together an incredible set, covering 10s of thousands of square feet to recreate a medieval kingdom!!

 Over 245 kids (1st-4th Grades) were in attendance on the first night alone!!

 King David was the first guest on "Roxie's Kingdom Rocks the Future" TV show w/ special announcer "CoCo"... Can't wait to meet the rest of the special guests this week: Queen Esther, Nehemiah, King Josiah & Jesus!!

 

Over 100 volunteers have served at VBS this year... And that is why we know the community we call New Beginnings is doing something different in the area of Family Ministry (Faith Talk, Faith Walk, Faith Mission & Faith Map... Click on any of the "Faith" Titles for more information)!!

We are so excited about what is happening at New Beginnings and we hope you will not only come be apart of VBS this week (June 10th-14th) but join us this summer at 9:30a & 11a each Sunday!!

Want to hear more about Family Ministry at New Beginnings!? 

Please attend: Kingdom Rocks closing ceremony Friday at 7:30p!!

Sweetest words to hear…

In a short moment, the doors would open and reveal a large gathering of friends and family rising to see the beautiful bride escorted down the flower laden aisle. It was in this precious time shared between father and daughter that all the anticipation and excitement of the big day, the fullness of meaningful friendship, and gratitude for all those in attendance began to feel a bit overwhelming. Brittany clutched her dad’s arm a little tighter and said, “I need you to steady me… Like when we went repelling – ease my anxiety. Be here for me.”

Brittany had recalled a time from a family vacation back when she was nine years old. When it was her turn to repel down the face of a cliff, she was terrified and rightfully so. Repelling goes against all natural instinct – lean back in your harness, press against the wall with your feet, and lower down the mountain. For two hours the group had tried to coax her to come down the ropes, but to no avail. Finally she said, “I’ll go if my daddy goes.” Scared and tearful, Brittany made her way down the cliff with Brian right next to her - coaching, encouraging, and reassuring his daughter each step of the way until they reached the bottom safely.

So on our wedding day, nearly twenty years later, my wife looked to her dad and affirmed that he has been sought for comfort and stability through the years and was needed again. Isn’t that what every father longs for? To know that we’ve loved well and we’re still needed? I’m moved by the richness of this story and by the God who allows us to see such pictures and be reminded of Him. For surely our heavenly Father desires the same… “God, be here with me. Hold me up. Lead me on like you always have. Lord, I’ll go...but only if You go with me.” How pleasant those words must sound to our Savior!!

Brian would be the first to admit that he’s not a perfect parent. Yet I can assure you that he's helped his daughters see Jesus. We all have instances that we would redo if we could. However, I think that our shortcomings as parents may be the very reason we’re called to such a high task. Is it possible that parenthood has been given so that we might gain a taste of God’s unconditional love? And perhaps our struggles in the arena of parenting are designed to lead us to hope and strive in Christ’s strength alone? Friend, I believe that like all things, the relationships we have with our children are ultimately given to point us all toward Jesus – parent and child alike.

Praise God for the opportunities we have to make treasured memories and for His goodness and mercy to redeem our mistakes. May the Lord show the depth of His love to our children through our faithfulness to Him… And as you consider getting a Father’s Day gift this week, may I suggest something different from the traditional necktie or fishing lure. Simply share your heart with your daddy and let him know he’s still needed. For I believe that earthly dads & our heavenly Father would all agree, those are truly the sweetest words to hear.

"I Still Do!" A Tribute to Covenant Marriage

"I Do!" June 7, 1980

Today is my 33rd wedding anniversary. I have been blessed to be married to this beautiful lady since June 7th, 1980! I can say without reservation that my marriage has done more to influence my kid’s faith than anything else I have ever done. Since the day I was married I have taught or preached over 6000 times, I have led dozens of mission trips, and I have directed too many VBS’es to remember. I have had countless Faith Talks and Faith Walks in our home. Yet it is my marriage that has contributed more significantly to our children’s spiritual formation than all of these actions combined. Let me explain.

The girls with my girl!

Each year, for 33 years, I have been asked to officiate a wedding ceremony. Over the years the emphasis of my talk at the wedding altar has shifted from the engaged couple and the congregation to something more important. I have begun to emphasize God, His Son, and His covenant to redeem the world.

1. At weddings I explain how God ordained marriage to be a key feature of His design for humanity.
2. I teach at the marital ceremony that marriage was deliberately created by God to be a metaphor for His love for His church.
3. I ask them to make a vow that they would give themselves to each other the same way that Jesus gave Himself for His bride – the church.
4. I explain that Jesus made His bride holy through divine sacrifice, through loving grace, through heavenly selflessness.
5. I show the couple, the wedding party, and the congregation in the bible that this was God’s strategy from the very beginning!

• Genesis 2:24 - Moses recorded God's intent.
• Matthew 19:4-6 - Jesus validated God's intentional design.
• Mark 10:6-8 - Jesus validated God's intentional design.
• Ephesians 5:21-31 Paul described God's design.

How have our kid’s faith been influenced by our marriage? You ask?
For the most part, Carol and I have been wise enough to know that our kids are constantly watching and learning from us. Our actions (both good and bad) are always teaching them about marriage, about patience (or impatience), about love (or selfishness), about grace (or annoyance), about intimacy (or self protection), about sacrifice (or greediness), about respect (or contempt) etc., etc..
Our kid (and your kids too) are smart enough to spot hypocrisy. It wouldn’t matter what we taught at church if our actions at home shouted, “Phonies!”But the reality for me is that I would be thrilled if my kids experienced a similar type of marriage that Carol and I share. Our marriage is definitely not perfect, but we’re both very thankful of what we’ve developed over 33 years. 
Although not every child follows the Lord even when their parents marriage is solid, it is my contention that parent’s marriages can shape their kid’s faith to be solid or to be frail. 

What are our kids watching and how can we imitate Jesus? You ask?
Here are 8 things that I know my kids have observed from us over the years:



1. Laughter: We have fun! There were game nights, stories and jokes told, singing, pratfalls, dancing, etc. I miss the sounds of life and fun now that my kids are grown. We laughed a lot in our house and Carol’s sense of humor still cracks me up. I like having my kids see that she makes me laugh.

We still have fun but there aren’t as many people contributing to the entertainment and we like the quiet too.
2. Affection: Carol & I are still very affectionate and I like enjoyed the affection but I also enjoyed having my kids see me holding their mom’s hand, hugging, kissing, cuddling, etc… as often as I could
3. Affirmation: Encouragement is my main spiritual gift so it’s easy for me to dish out encouraging words. My kids got a lot of verbal affirmation. My kids still joke about how wonderful we told them they were/are. Carol has said before, “The world will knock them off that pedestal we put them on. It not our job to crush their dreams.”
4. Time: Our kids know that we like to spend time together. When they see us steal time away to sit in the backyard and talk, or go on a date night, or sneak away for the weekend…that’s a good message I wanted them to see and appreciate.


5. Respect:
   • Opening the door for Carol
   • Saying “thank you” and “please.”
   • Not raising my voice when discussing difficult issues.
   • Trying to refrain from sarcasm or eye-rolling.
   • Always affirming her opinion in front of the kids, even when we disagreed.
   These are a few of the ways we expressed mutual respect and showing her simple signs of respect.


6. Faith Talks: One of Carol’s favorite things to do is discuss with me what she is teaching or learning in scripture. She has the spiritual gift of teaching so talking about the bible energizes her. We were not always having theological discussions in front of our kids, but they heard and saw our faith talks and knew that we’re always talking about Jesus and what it means to be a follower/disciple.

7. Saying, “I’m sorry.” Risking transperancy… this is NOT a list of behaviors I wish my kids hadn’t seen. For the times when I was cranky, too busy, humorless, and disrespectful, I wanted to be quick to say, “I’m sorry,” and I wanted my kids to hear me say it.
8. Servanthood: I know my kids have had a better example in Carol than with me because she is an exemplary servant. Carol has always helped our family keep things neat, clean, and organized in spite of the rest of us. I have learned to appreciate the environment she has created through her selfless service. Serving one another has been seen in the daily, little things and there’s many opportunities to serve around the house.

Thunder up! 

Kids are always watching their parent’s marriage and yet too many marriages underestimate the power of modeling! Children are taking daily recordings of what a marriage looks like and those recordings are definitely influencing and shaping their view of marriage and their perspective on faith.
On this day I want to say, “Thank you Carol for partnering with me to raise 3 amazing kids, and making me a very happy man at the same time. I love you! Happy Anniversary!

Is "discipline" a bad word?

My grandson Urijah is now a little over one year old. He has begun to pull himself up to things that he is interested in touching, twisting, or putting in his mouth. Of course there are some things in the house that his father and mother have determined should not be touched, twisted or put in his mouth. These are things that have been declared off limits for him, because they believe those things could either be harmful to himself or a harmful to the object. Exhibit A below.

Hmmmm, sound familiar? Even at the beginning of time, when God created man and woman, there were boundaries set by our heavenly Father, to help protect us from harm.Unfortunately, since that time, when Adam and Eve chose to disobey God the Father, every man and woman have had to make a choice between right and wrong, following selfish desires over choosing self-control.

Little Urijah has been told numerous times not to touch the items he is touching in Exhibit A above and Exhibit B below.
 

Urijah chose not to listen to his father and mother's instruction, because why? He just can't help himself. He is just one year old. He really doesn't know any better. He hasn't yet developed self-control. He is too young to understand. Really? (pause) Really?

Because it appears that Urijah thought no one was looking when he decided to do what he has been told not to do. See Exhibit C below. Note that he has paused to see that he was mistaken.Someone (Papa) was watching him all along and now little Urijah has stopped all body movement, not moving a muscle, and is now considering the pending results of his actions.

So at this point, I guess his mom and dad (who also have been watching without him knowing) should just let him continue to do it, right? After all, he is SOOOOOO CUTE. And, he hasn't destroyed anything, right? It's just some electronics that can be replaced, right? He is surely not going to die from doing what he is doing, right?

Hmmmm, sound familiar? What was the harm in eating a little fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil? The woman "saw that it was pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom," Genesis 3:6. What's the big deal? It was just a piece of "pleasing to the eye" fruit, right? How could eating a little piece of fruit be such a big deal? I guess we know the answer to that question now.

There are reasons why there are boundaries, guidelines, instructions, training and discipline in life. These things are established to protect us and to shape our decision-making, so that when given choices in life, we have some kind of reference or guide to make the right choice over a wrong choice.And some times we need to obey, even when we don't understand the reasons why at the time.

Who is establishing that reference or guide for making decisions in Urijah's life right now? No doubt it is his parents. How important is that role in his life right now, even at age 1? It's extremely important. There are no two people better positioned in Urijah's life right now to set the boundaries, guidelines, instruction, training and discipline than his parents. It's the way God has always intended it to be and He began by His own example in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve.He gave them instructions to follow. But He didn't just give them instructions to follow and then not have a response to not following them. What would be the purpose then? He loved them enough to discipline them, when they did not follow the instructions.

Urijah faces choices every day of his life, even at this young age. Eventually, he will be totally on his own, away from parental controls and making more choices.The years between now and then shape his future for the decisions he will make. Self discipline or lack of self discipline will determine his choices. Yes, he will make mistakes, but the question is, will he learn from those mistakes and turn and make better decisions in the future or will he continue to make mistakes over and over. How will he learn if he has made a mistake or not? Parents play a huge role in how that turns out. Yes, the child and eventual adult gets to choose. God gave us all free will as individual humans. But He, God, is the ultimate parent. His Word, the ultimate instruction book. He is the supreme role model for parents to follow. He has given us instructions to follow for a reason, just as you have given your children instructions for a reason, so that they will hopefully listen, learn and choose wisely.

Jeff wrote yesterday in his blog: "Kids do what their parents/adults do." We set the example. How would you rate your self-discipline in Christ? What kind of role model are you for your children? Are you following the boundaries, instruction, guidelines, training from our heavenly Father? How do you respond to His discipline? Yes, we adults make mistakes too. How are we teaching our children what we are learning from our own mistakes?

Hebrews 7-11
7 Endure suffering as discipline: God is dealing with you as sons. For what son is there that a father does not discipline? 8 But if you are without discipline—which all receive—then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9 Furthermore, we had natural fathers discipline us, and we respected them. Shouldn’t we submit even more to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they disciplined us for a short time based on what seemed good to them, but He does it for our benefit, so that we can share His holiness. 11 No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the fruit of peace and righteousness to those who have been trained by it.


Terry Langenberg
Twitter: TheLangenberg
Facebook: TheLangenberg