The authority behind these 10 things is the Hebrew Shema. The Shema is the oldest fixed daily prayer in Judaism. It has been recited morning and night in faithful Jewish homes since ancient times. The Shema has been a significant part of traditional Jewish prayer books.
Deuteronomy 6:4-9 “Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is One. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. 6 These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. 7 Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. 9 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”
But is important to understand that if we repeat a memorized phrase without engaging our minds and actions, then the phrase can develop into a tired, meaningless routine. This is not how to make disciples of adults or children. There mustn’t be anything tired and meaningless about our faith in God. In fact, our faith must be daring, courageous, and contagious. This is the spirit that we must embrace when considering effective ways to disciple our children. Ground central in the Shema is the home. The home is where faith is discussed, demonstrated and experienced.
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| Inside the "Tefillin" are handwritten parchments with Biblical texts |
- These words… are to be in your heart - This first thing is perhaps the most important thing to do of all 10 things. Before you can disciple your kids, you must first be a disciple yourself. At New Beginnings Church we define a disciples lie this: A disciple of Jesus is someone who is following Jesus, is being transformed by Jesus, and is dedicated to the mission of Jesus: obediently making disciples of Jesus. Your kids learn discernment. They can spot a phony from a mile away. If they experience hypocrisy from their parents or if they watch their parent demonstrate a split personality (holy church persona vs. hellish home persona), then they are being discipled to become spiritually schizophrenic hypocrites themselves. Discipleship is more caught than taught. Kids can’t hear their parents words if their actions are screaming something else. If you stumble (and you will stumble) your kids will experience the gospel if you will – authentically and transparently – apologize, ask forgiveness, and repent from involvement in that area of stumbling. There is no better way to teach them than to show them. Our kids need to see us struggle, mess up, yet reply with gospel centered reconciliation. Our responses to one another, must be Christ-like, God focused, and gospel centered! • Mistakes are made, • Grace is offered, • Forgiveness is experienced, • Repentance causes change, and • Mercy is enjoyed! The gospel response is always the best response and this is how our kid’s faith will be best influenced.
- Repeat them to your children - There should be regular, intentional conversations about all kinds of matters of faith in your home. There are countless ways to do this - share bible stories, tell life stories where the presence and power of God was experienced, ask about what happened at church, share your concerns about what is happening (during reality TV shows, during the news, when media values contrary to the scripture is expressed on tall forms of media, inappropriate jokes, etc.). Take time to be heard and to listen to your family. Repeat, say it again, reiterate, go over it another time, recap! Just don’t stay quiet, uninvolved, and disconnected to the things of God and His Word.
- Talk about them when you sit in your house - Last week I wrote about family dinner time. Planned and intentional discussions with your kids about spiritual things are essential to making disciples. Deuteronomy 6:7 remind parent that when their children “lie down and get up,” are prime times for having spiritual discussions.
- Talk about them when you walk along the road- Admittedly, families don’t do as much walking as did families before there were automobiles and highways. However, transportation time is prime time for having Faith Talks and Faith Walks. Sadly, transportation time can also be a time for arguing, lecturing, and ignoring one another. But this time in the car can be redeemed for the gospel. We did a lot of singing with our kids. My wife is an expert at asking questions. The solution is to not allow this precious transportation time opportunity to escape. As soon as your kids are old enough to drive, the days of the family car ride are rare.
- Talk about them when you lie down- I have cherished the times when I prayed with my kids before bed. That is when we taught them to pray. Bed time is when we prayed - out loud - together.
- Talk about them when you get up- Mornings can be hectic. Some kids (and parents for that matter) are not “morning people.” But this is the best time to prepare for the day. A habit of “starting off the day” with prayer or a quiet time can be modeled in the morning. How would your day have changed if you and your family would have been awakened by gentle praise music this morning?
- Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead - Orthodox Jews observe this command literally. “Tefillin” are two black leather boxes and straps to hold them on. One is worn on the biceps, and its strap, which is tied with a special knot, is wound by the wearer seven times around the forearm and hand. The second box is worn on the forehead at the hairline, with its straps going around the back of the head, connected at the top of the neck with a special knot, and hanging in front on each side. But I think this phrase should remind us to have the scripture displayed in places that are regularly seen and visited (refrigerator door, bathroom mirror, notes in a lunch box or backpack, etc.). This phrase can also symbolize the concept that the Word of God should be on your mind/thoughts and close to your hands/actions.
- Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates - Are there places where you can display important bible passages or words of encouragement that your entire family will see when they are going out or coming home? Perhaps you could make a note on back door to the garage, or on the out side of the door for your family to read and be encouraged.
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| Click on the picture to read this father's encouraging note. |
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Maybe the task of changing these messages could be share between all family members. This phrase can also symbolize the concept that the Word of God should be with you when you leave the safety of home and there for you at home to remind you of your blessings.
Maybe the task of changing these messages could be share between all family members. This phrase can also symbolize the concept that the Word of God should be with you when you leave the safety of home and there for you at home to remind you of your blessings.
Making disciples in your family is not rocket science. It is happening accidently every day. However, some parents are making lazy, disinterested disciples. Other parents are unintentionally making hypocritical, fake disciples. We must be intentional to make vibrant, growing disciples in the home.
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| Dr. Phil Sallee, Pastor twitter.com/philsallee facebook.com/phil.sallee philsallee.info nbchurch.info nbfamilies.info |
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