Along the way I learned several lessons that I hope you will find helpful:
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| Success is more than winning. |
- Your kids are learning about more than baseball They are learning about more important things like character strengths, integrity, honesty, and respect. Sadly, they may be learning about character weaknesses like dishonesty, cheating, and disrespect. They are learning the process of failure. Failure is a very real part of life. Nobody is perfect. The very best major league baseball hitters fail 7 out of 10 times. They are watching you and learning how to behave when there is a fail. Every one must learn to self-sooth. If parents model making excuses (the wind, the sun, the pitcher, etc.) or blame the failures on others (the umpire, the coach, the equipment), the kid will never learn to self-sooth. Worse, they will learn that they have no control over their own failures.
Situation: Negative Response: Positive Response: Strike out! Blame the umpire! Encourage the hitter. Dropped ball! Make excuses! Encourage the player. Over thrown ball! Blame the one catching or the coach. Encourage the thrower. Base running error. Blame the coach or the one who tagged. Encourage the base runner. Throw a fit or rage. Ignore the tantrum. Politely ask thier coach to bench them immediately, maybe the next game too. - Your kids are learning about how to take responsibility. You can be an encouragement to them if you say: I saw how hard you tried and I was proud of you. I know how hard that is. I saw how frustrated you were I knew how bad you wanted that, and I was so pleased with you. You can remind them of past successes! You can offer to play catch with them or throw them soft toss later for fun.
- Your kids are learning about how to treat others. You can be an encouragement to them if you say: I saw how you encouraged your friend after the failed, that’s really impressive. I saw how you kept your emotions in check and your head down, instead of glaring at or yelling at the ref will coach, you are a good example. Your coach and teammates will really learn to respect you, if you continue to show you have a high opinion of them like you did today.
- Your kids are learning about how to be leaders. You can be an encouragement to them if you say: I saw how encouraging you were to your team, way to go. So how you help them up after they had fallen down, I love when you do that. I like to hear you cheer and clap for your team mates when they do something good, I bet they like it too. I watch how your team observes you, I think they like what they see.
- Your kids are learning to stay fit and have fun. Parents need to remember that kids are kids and want to have fun. They need to be reminded that this is a game and it should be enjoyable. Parents need to prepare kids for a lifetime of physical fitness. Too many kids have become accustomed to leisure activities and video games. The result is a lack of fitness in epidemic proportions. Have fun playing sports can set kids up for a lifetime of healthier, more enjoyable living if they grow up enjoying physical activities. You can also make a positive impact on your kids by having a conversation about the poor behavior you observed as well. There’s plenty unfortunate conduct on the field of play to examine. Volunteer coaches often will display favoritism towards their sons or daughters. They will also coach their kids more severely than the rest of the team. Unfortunately, bad behavior is easy for parents to discuss with their kids so that their kids will know which behaviors to avoid.
These lessons can be applied to every sport.
Dr. Phil Sallee, Pastor
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